Wednesday, December 27, 2017

Bill and the Spanking Thing - Doctor Who 2017 Christmas Special

[ 1] “you’re in for a jolly good smacked bottom!”
[13] "Oh, brilliant!"

You all know why I write about Doctor Who. Didn't expect fireworks for this year's Christmas episode, in fact I'd given myself some time off till New Year's Day from blogging, but my hand was forced. And yes, if you haven't seen Twice Upon a Time, it's spoilers from here on, you silly.

femdom spanking bottom, doctor who, bill potts, twice upon a time, christmas
I've always been a sucker for smiling women. (Image Doctor Who/BBC)

On the third day of Christmas, Dutch writes about Doctor Who. Don't get me wrong, I enjoyed all Doctors, but the Twelfth Doctor [12] is my favourite. Matt Smith was too young and to jolly. David Tenant a bit older, but also trying too hard to be popular. The original reboot Doctor, Christoper Eclleston - a single season Timelord only - was great though.

Tuesday, December 26, 2017

The 2017 Christmassy 'n' Femdommy Movies List

A list of 11 of the best Christmas movies with a strong femdom theme. But be warned, the list is as varied as femdom is. Not that I shy away from clichés. It's Christmas after all, the only season where the festive colours turn from black and red to green and red. But if you don't like my selection, please feel free to send me your own femdom homevideo....

femdom dominatrix catwoman batman bondage lady fyre enslaved crusader
Black, Red, & Green: femdom X-Mas homemovie.
Catwoman and the enslaved crusader.
(Image: Lady Fyre/Fetish Island)

As part of last year's Christmas treat, I rated female Disney villains for their kink pedigree. That didn't get many of you excited, perhaps too highbrow for some? I don't know, but I am always willing to sink to the lowest common denominator, so here are the 11 Christmas movies, most likely to appeal to those, interested in femdom, the official 2017 very Christmassy 'n' Femdommy Movies (CFM) list.

Note: In case I get it wrong [again], just attribute it to my penchant for public humiliation. It's something of an involuntarily twitch. I guess.

Monday, December 25, 2017

Wishing on a Star - Or how the Grinch Strikes Back

The Grinch Strikes Back

Two years ago I wrote how the Grinch stole our Christmas. This year he is back with a vengeance, messing with our love once again.

Our story picks up again in January 2017:


Of course our love is forever. Everybody knows that. All loves are. We all know. That is, as long as both parties stick to the script. Us? We've said our goodbyes many times over. Little did I know there are two kinds of farewell. One where lovers misspell “I miss you” and the other – whatever - one. We even convinced ourselves we had moved on. In my never-ending arrogance, I wrote just that - presumptuously speaking for the both of us.

Tuesday, December 19, 2017

Femdom's Final [Sci Fi] Frontier

Houston, Houston, Do You Read?

In a peaceful world without men, what would be the impact of just three of them? A 1967 sci fi novels deals with that topic, raising additional questions about gender-roles, patriarchy and feminism.

"Houston, Houston, Do You Read?", femdom, matriarchy, alice sheldon, james tiptree jr.
Wave the flag (Image: Greatest SF)

After reading my post on femdom sci fi and Star Wars, Subboyjoy sent an interesting suggestion, proving once again that kink and sci fi are indeed connected.

Thursday, December 14, 2017

Femdom, Sci Fi and Star Wars

Sci-Fi has always served as an inspiration for people interested into role play - and kink. Today, the ninth Star Wars movie is being released. Time to mix some kink with Star Wars.

Oh, the force is with me all the time.

Midway through December, the holidays just around the corner, it's time for a little banter. In the almost five years that my blog has been up and running, I've often advocated not to take your kink too seriously. Don't worry, I say the same thing about life. Anything I do take seriously? Yes, love, not the easiest of topics, especially not in a community where most believe submission is about matters of the heart rather than their own animal desires.

Sunday, December 10, 2017

Fifty Shades - or How Not to Sell a Washing Machine

To most people washing machines and Fifty Shades are worlds apart, but not for some copy writers. Who is the real pervert here?

Fifty Shades, bondage
Sex sells [I think], even if it is Fifty Shades

Sex sells, everybody in advertising knows, but for most people sex doesn't necessarily equal femdom. Remember that 2011 dominatrix/vodka video? After a woman kisses her husband goodbye and wishes him a pleasant day at work, the doorbell rings. All of a sudden she is transformed into this dominatrix, wearing a latex bikini, wielding her crop. Next thing you see is a man in his underwear, scrubbing the floor while feeling the pressure of her boot in his neck.

Tuesday, December 05, 2017

Kink Dating Apps

Fetlife is so last year. A discussion of four dating and community apps for kinksters: Whiplr, KNKY, Kinkstr and KinkD.

(Image: KNKY)

A couple of years ago I estimated the number of kinksters in the Netherlands. I used the number of Fetlife users worldwide and divided it by the same global number for Facebook. Femdom Resource did something similar by looking at the ratio of kinky people to city population and came up with a list of most kinky cities, relatively that is. He used the KinkD subscription numbers per city as input for his estimate.

Saturday, December 02, 2017

"My Family's Slave": A Story about Modern Day Slavery

Last May The Atlantic published a story by Alex Tizón, called "My family's slave." After I read it, I knew, this is what I want to write about for this year's edition of the International Day for the Abolition of Slavery. I urge you to read the story for yourself, but a warning: it's not an easy read.

Thursday, November 30, 2017

Jacky in the Kingdom of Women

A satirical French movie, in which gender roles are reversed, has a distinct femdom tone.

"jacky in the kingdom of women" o-ring
Man with chador and o-ring looking for love
(image: Jacky in the kingdom of women)

Before I begin, yes I am aware that the phrase 'kingdom of women' is ironic. I'll save the discussion for when I write about the OWK.

Ever dreamt of a country where women rule and men are lead around on a leash? Of course you have. Dream no more and emigrate to Bubanne, a fictional matriarchal tyranny lead by the Generales, who enjoys hanging people, mainly men of course.

Saturday, November 25, 2017

"Bring your Master to Work" Day

One woman wants to wear her slave collar to work, another one asks her co-workers to address her boyfriend as master at the office party. What can possibly go wrong?

Office party!

I found this particular little gem on Not Just Bitchy and it is from 2016. If you work in an office you know a lot of things are completely absurd. Just think about the management jargon being used, expressions such as “doing a deep dive”, “reaching out”, and “thought leadership”. I don't know what they mean by that, but more often than not it is nonsense.

Monday, November 20, 2017

Douchebag Dom Wants New Sub to Kick Out Current One

Collar Me folded in 2014 to be replaced by Collar Chat. As usual I'm a bit slow, so today for the first time I visited the site and while there were many hilarious conversations, one stood out. Not because it was funny but because of how sad it was.

naio harukawa, bbw women, facesitting
Classic Namio Harukawa

Tuesday, November 14, 2017

Alpha-Inn, Tokyo: The World's only BDSM Hotel

In February 2015 I wrote an article called 'delicious dungeon furniture'. It is the all-time most popular post on this blog. Why remains a mystery. In its introduction I mentioned that one day I would set up my own chain of BDSM parlors, loosely based on the Alpha-Inn Fashion Hotel in Tokyo. Today it is time for a closer look.

bdsm femdom tokyo japan alpha-in fashion hotel, s&m hotel, love hotel

Friday, October 27, 2017

Un-Dommely Behaviour

Are there rules on how a domme oughta behave? Should there be? What does dominance mean anyway?

femdom, dominatrix, mistress, claire adams, men in pain
One happy domme (Image: Clair Adams for Men in Pain)

There once was a man who was richer than anybody else. Like the rest of the jet-set he enjoyed skiing in the winter in some posh Swiss village. Unlike them all, he didn't care what he looked like. After yet another day filled with snowy adventures, he and the rest of the jet-set inevitably settled down for dinner in one particular restaurant. It took the participants on average two hours to get dressed for this big non-event. Not him, he quickly changed into a pair of jeans and a comfortable - ugly - sweater. Why?

Tuesday, October 24, 2017

The Beast Yapoo III: Translation in Progress

The Beast Yapoo has been translated in several languages, but not English. Finally someone has made a start with it.

the beast yapoo, yapu, human cattle, numa shozo

If you look at the cannon of BDSM books, three books stand out. First there is The 120 Days of Sodom written by Marquis the Sade, the words sadism and sadists are derived from his name. Then there is Venus in Furs a novella written by the Austrian author Leopold von Sacher-Masoch, the namesake for the word masochism.

Friday, September 01, 2017

Miniature Rope Bondage Chairs

Art is whatever you want it to be, but these miniature rope bondage chairs have little to do with either art or kink.
miniature rope bondage chair red
All similarities with the world's kinkiest chair are purely coincidental

Last month I wrote about the world's kinkiest chair. Why? Mainly because I love the idea of turning everyday objects into kink toys. And of course because it was a beautiful image, rating 9/10 on my fetish fantasy scale, but above all because it was devoid of the usual metal bars 'n cuffs. The colours were spot-on too.

Saturday, August 26, 2017

The World's Kinkiest Chair

The image of a chair makes me wonder: when do everyday objects become kink toys. One chair certainly does!

femdom chair, bdsm, ball gag, kinky, slave, mistress
There's something about that tiny black fussball on a cord...

A chair is just a chair, unless.... Oh, come on! You know what this blog is all about. Just spill it. Yes, that's right! Some chairs are more equal than others. The real question is why. That's a good one.

Tuesday, August 01, 2017

You wouldn't want to get Marmite on your Furry Handcuffs

furry handcuffs, marmite, airport travel, confiscated food

It is that time of year again. Today is the first of August and most of the Western world is officially on holiday. Going abroad brings its own problems. For some British that means surviving a fortnight or more without Marmite, a typical British product, little seen outside the country.

Tuesday, July 04, 2017

Dominatrix Turned Police Officer Suspended over Her Past

A former dominatrix turns police officer, but is suspended just before graduation when her superiors find out about her past.

We should be able to do the job we love.

Changing careers can be challenging, especially if you used to be a dominatrix. Today I ran into a story on one of the boards about Domina Nyx. Six days before graduating from police academy she was suspended after her bosses found out she used to work as a professional dominatrix and shooting a number of BDSM movies.

Sunday, June 25, 2017

Don't Kill Bill

WARNING: This article contains spoilers from Doctor Who series 10 episode 11: World Enough and Time.

Missy Doctor Who Femdom dominatrix Doctor Who series 10 episode 11: World Enough and Time.
Full Frontal Missy (Image: BBC/Doctor Who)

Missy: “Hello, I’m Doctor Who, and these are my plucky assistants, Thing One and … the other one. We picked up your distress call, and here we are to help, like awesome heroes.”

Saturday, June 24, 2017

Humiliatrix Ceara Lynch: “Weird is normal to me”

By chance I stumbled upon an interview with Ceara Lynch in the Daily Dot. It dates back to mid-April and even for someone who isn't into her speciality it makes a good read.

findomme humiliatrix ceara lynch
Ceara Lynch (image: The Daily Dot)

A humiliatrix is like a dominatrix, but instead of using whips and chains, I use my words,” Lynch explains. “I abuse men verbally, not physically. The internet is my dungeon.”

Saturday, June 10, 2017

You've Got Mail

As a male sub I'm slightly amused by the rambling messages other subs send me, begging for the opportunity to serve. When you are a domme it must be very annoying. Some examples from my inbox.

Watch and learn...

Monday, June 05, 2017

That Alpha Thing

A few days ago I read a post by a well-known American pro-domme. It was your usual alpha rant - with a twist. Whenever I see the word "alpha" I get upset before I've even read the article. This time was no different.

The dominatrix expected her potential clients to devote their lives to something bigger than themselves: HER. Just the sheer fact you consider yourself an alpha personality is enough to get me cross. For one, I truly believed that any alpha worth the name will never refer to herself as such. Imagine how silly that would be. A "true" alpha surveys the landscape and divides it in those they are going have to fight for supremacy and those that will surrender without hesitation.

Friday, May 26, 2017

Shibari You Can Use

A book on bondage techniques might just be the thing to get you started.

By chance I stumbled upon a book about Shibari. Bondage is one of the things I enjoy and the possibilities that rope offers are endless. Despite that I prefer leather cuffs - let's say it's a different kind of menace.

Tuesday, May 09, 2017

The Black and White Uniform

Can a conventional dress - or colour combination - also be "apropriate" domme outfit?
femdom bdsm, dominant woman in black and white placing her foot on a man's chest

Throughout this blog I have confessed to several femdom 'sins'. Last year for example, I admitted that I love toys. Like most slaves I enjoy dommes in 'traditional' outfits. Traditional being leather and latex uniforms. Just remember a like is not a necessity.

Saturday, May 06, 2017

Memoires of a Heroin-Addicted Dominatrix

When a newspaper article puts the emphasis on a woman's years working as a dominatrix instead of the woman she has become.

If that headline isn't click-bait, I don't know what is. Today British newspaper The Guardian has an article on Melissa Febos, an academic who worked as a professional dominatrix when she was in college. She also struggled with heroin addiction during those years. My initial reaction was: "here we go again."

Tuesday, April 25, 2017

Stealing Her Happiness

Any man worth the name would give up his soul for the woman he loves. Unfortunately that is a far cry from the average slave who obeys his mistress. No matter how you look at it, love is superior. Always and forever.

Kink is not a choice, it is part of who you are. It's also one of many reasons why Fifty Shades is no more than just another silly novel. Unfortunately, we, the choosen ones, pay a price for our alternative sexual orientation. That price comes in many ways. Just think about the vast hoards of dommes roaming the hills and valleys of Fetlife for that one unicorn, they praise as the perfect slave. Meanwhile on the other side of them hills where the grass is inevitably greener, those very same slaves disown themselves in search of that one, last available siren, the woman they - one day - are privileged to call mistress.

Saturday, April 15, 2017

Secret Society of Sadistic Secretaries
SOS Part V: The 400 to 1 Grand Finale

The 400 to 1 Grand Finale.

Part Five of the Secret Society of Sadistic Secretaries. Part Four: Here

A fictional tale about a real world secret

In between individual presentations and the panel discussion that would wrap up the convention, the organization had planned a bit of entertainment. Yes, that is correct: more fun at my expense. My services were called upon once again. Well, not exactly called upon, nor summoned. I was simply there, tied up with no way out. On top of that I was exhausted from the non-stop carnage I'd endured all morning.

male chastity belt - built in dildo - shock device - remote control - educational shield - pain - femdom
As always: No way out.

As a guy who considers kink to be a liberal interpretation of sex and hence women, the whole thing had been an emotional drain from the start. On top of that I was worn down physically. Her smile - and the occasional sparkle in her eye - is what kept me going. Not that it prepared me for what was to come.

Friday, April 07, 2017

Silly Science: BDSM as a Tourist Destination

When science turns to studying BDSM, the results are more than a bit odd. Nobody compares BDSM to tourism.

Not suited for accidental tourists.

We all are who we are. Our sexuality is for the most part genetically defined. Despite that BDSM is a long way from being generally accepted. Let me give you a recent example. According to IT website The Register: "A prominent contributor to the open source Drupal content management system has been asked to distance himself from project because his belief system is inconsistent with [the] project's goals."

Sunday, March 26, 2017


A domme who is able to control her sadism when necessary inadvertently reveals her inner strength in a way few people ever will.


Trying to explaing what the kinky comfort zone means to me, I realized there is another element in femdom I cherish: the deep bond between two people under the most adverse of circumstances.

Trust is hard. We all got burned in the past. We will all get burned in the future. Despite that, stop trusting others is the worst we can do. Trust matters. Trust, but be smart about it. Especially when it comes to S&M and you are literally helpless, when you find yourself at the mercy of your mistress.

Friday, February 10, 2017

Fifty Shades Darker

They just had to do it, again.

This February, two years ago, I pitied the fool who got tickets to see the original "Fifty Shades" movie on Valentine's Day. I even came up with a list of movies to see instead. I'm quite sure watching "Fifty Shades" wreaked havoc - of a different kind - on many a relationship. Unintended consequences and so on.

Fifty Shades Darker, Christian Grey, Dakota Johnson, Anastasia Steele, Jamie Dornan, movie
Fifty Shades Darker (Image: The New York Times)

Thursday, January 26, 2017

San Francisco Armory: From Kink HQ to Musical Venue

the end of an era

The Armory is a BDSM movie studio - a haven perhaps - that stands out for its educational qualities. The 200.000 sq foot building will soon be converted into a musical theatre. Yet the tune of femdom movies will continue to go on in Las Vegas.

San Francisco Armory - head quarter, home of femdom video labels divine bitches and men in pain. owner mr. peter acworth.
The San Franciso Armory - Most likely successor to the OWK

After watching the final episode of Sherlock, series four, I began to fantasize where to relocate the Other World Kingdom (OWK) to. The idea came to me after seeing a top secret prison facility on the show - don't ask.

Thursday, January 19, 2017

Remote Controlled Electrical Implant

Perhaps "no limits" isn't such a good idea after all...

mistress eve minax remote controlled electrical implant electro play slave girl
Mistress Minax with her hooded slave girl.

One of the things I like most when it comes to kink is the weird stuff. By its very definition kink is weird. But what I mean is the things that most kinksters consider unusual.

Some time ago I ran into an Alice in Bondageland video on one of the tubes. They are among my favourite because mistress Alice "wants to put the fun back into femdom." I couldn't agree more.

Monday, January 09, 2017

Highly Tributed Lifestyle Domme Part V  
11 Reasons to Visit a Pro-Domme

In this fifth and final episode of the "Highly Tributed Lifestyle Domme", I'm not only happy to have escaped her clutches, I also give you 11 reasons why you should consider visiting a pro-domme.

Irene Adler, Sherlock, Pro-domme, dominatrix, TV & movies
Nobody questions her motives.

The "highly tributed lifestyle domme" series was inspired by a single comment to Miss Pearl's article on why she never will go pro. I disagree with Miss Pearl on many issues - good thing there is no right or wrong when it comes to kink - but her overall writing stands out.

Tuesday, January 03, 2017

Preaching to the [Non-Consensual] Perverted

For the nth time I ran into a "kink' video where a grown woman molests a doll. Everybody knows that doll is a substitute for a child. Legally nothing wrong with it. But it is not OK.

Chopped of the lady's head for her own good.

For many new readers of this blog, my writing often comes across as a roller-coaster at first. Spend a little time and you will agree that femdom - in all its wonderful varieties - is what I write about. Part of that deals with things that need fixing - or sometimes are dead wrong - in the femdom community.

Monday, January 02, 2017

Everyday Sadism

Sadism is not limited to kink. Chances are you already met one or more sadists in the office.

Kink is not all fun and games. We all know a number of dominant players who are untrustworthy, dishonest or just plain danger. That is before you start to think of those bad, dangerous people who seek refuge in the kink community. Quite a few of those scary monsters don't care about wrong or right. It is just as irrelevant to them as the difference between consensual and non-consensual.

Sunday, January 01, 2017

Bring Back Our Girls. Now & Alive

New Year's Day 2017. It's been 993 days since 217 girls were abducted in Nigeria. They are still not home. Happy New Year!

femdom bring back our girls, hope endures, 2 years on
Hope Endures

To be honest, I never believed they were "our" girls in the first place. Then again, nobody ever did, albeit for different reasons. A classic tale about climbing the Mount Everest has it that the first people to conquer it, ran into Coca Cola paraphernalia at various hights on their way to the top. After a successful return to base, they were puzzled, conveniently ignoring the fact the being the first high profile Westerner to climb the mountain is not the same as the first person - i.e. local - to conquer it.

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