Don't
"Please do not buy stainless steel or titanium [cock] rings. They seem cool until you can't get them off."[SaltyEM on Twitter]
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| This is a fun hospital. Look at the gorgeous eyes and beautiful smile of the lady in black. The real ER is not. |
[PS free power tool porn at the end. Over two million subs love it.]
So you bought a titanium cock ring on Amazon last week and now you're in trouble. More correctly you are in the ER and not excited about it. Agreed from a lower vantage point things looks somewhat different. Read this Tweet as a warning:
"If you come to the ER with a titanium cock ring that you cannot get off, our ring cutters are not sharp/strong enough to cut it. Which will result in us having to call the fire department to get their diamond saw, and this is a very undesired experience for everyone involved."
- Alana Kinrich, MD.
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| [Tweet here] |
Titanium is among the hardest metals known to man. Even if it would work, nobody wants an industrial strength angle grinder that close to their private parts. Not to mention the heat it generates. And those diamond saws the fire department uses are meant to cut people out of their cars in case of accident.
One guy has a narrow escape thanks to a smart bartender.
"I worked at a gay bath house in Denver and had someone do this. They purchased a steel one from me and came back later saying it was stuck and asked to use the bolt cutters on our back wall we used to cut locks off when someone lost a key. I said "No" for many... many reasons. He asked what he should do and told him he would need to go to the ER. I told him I had heard they have to insert a big needle into your🍆and drain the blood out and heard it hurts a lot. Seconds later I hear metal hitting the floor."
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| Tweet here. |
Conclusion: never do anything you wouldn't want to explain to the paramedics. Stay safe. And nope, still don't have my power tools back. Thanks for asking.
That's it for today's episode of Free Willy. And now for the free power tool porn: Project Farm has over two million subs and there's a reason why. Today we're testing angle grinders to get you in the mood just in case. Not that an angle grinder will do.
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Click to watch on Youtube. |
Face the music
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| Sia with David Guetta - Titanium. Did you expect another track. Tie a yellow ribbon round the ole oak tree for instance? Of course not. |
666
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| We're starting to forget. |
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