Wednesday, March 30, 2022

OWK IX: Beggars Can't Be Choosers

King of my castle anyone?

'My home is my castle, besides who needs a king when you can have a slave crawling on all fours instead?'

If you think French cleats are hot - finally figured out what they are? - autarky is even hotter. And not just because the OWK has at long last decided to dream big. 

Continued from OWK VIII - Sublime Ladies are the 'Product'

Why ask people for donations to repair the castle tower and as soon as repairs are finished announce you're looking for another place. Honestly that makes no sense at all. Or does it?

A while back I dug a little deeper into the history of the OWK and ran into two interesting articles. Because I don't speak Czech - Google does - everything is translated by our digital overlord. Apologies in advance, I've only corrected the most obvious errors. [2]

In 2008 a local Czech newspaper reports the castle compound at Černá is for sale. The asking price for the OWK is eight million euros (200 million Czech koruna). By the time the 2012 Olympics are being held in London, the asking price has been deflated by about three millions euros. In 2016 Czech newspaper Indnes also writes about the compound. It's still on the block for some five million euros.

"The chateau was built at the end of the 16th century by Jan Rafael Chroustenský. It was later confiscated from the Chrousten family. Darkness eventually fell to the Italian Collalt family over the entire estate, and its development was halted until 1918, when the Brtnice estate was developed by the same owners. After 1918, the manor, including the castle of the Collalt family, was confiscated. In 1931, Eduard Pavlíček from Tasov received the monument. He lost his property in 1949. The heirs of the last owner got the castle back after 1989."
"The heirs of the last owner were given back the castle in 1992 and soon sold the premises to the Zlín company."

Shortly after the fall of the Berlin Wall in 1989 the confiscated property was returned to the heirs of it's former owners, who sold it almost immediately. That's one thing but something else in the 2016 article also caught my attention.

""Černá Castle is for sale and no SMs or other services are provided there," said Aleš Sadil from The Other World Kingdom in Zlín. The company is the owner of the castle. According to Sadil, no videos are being shot there anymore. "Nothing is happening there now," he added."

The last time the local council spoke with the owners was some 20 years ago, around the time the castle was transformed into domme Disneyland. The paper quotes the mayor Vítězslav Plocek. His memories most likely date back to the mid zero's. "The last information I have from the Municipal Office in Velké Meziříčí is that the owners of the castle were interested in a grant for the repair of the tower. Then they came up saying they wouldn't repair it and sell it” according to the town's mayor.

It doesn't add up

Honestly, it doesn't. For several years the OWK ran a crowd funding campaign to restore the castle tower and its outer walls. It aimed for USD 24.000 for the two combined. According to the OWK website they reached their goal in 2017 and the tower was repaired some six months later. I don't know. No doubt prices are lower in the Czech Republic than in Western Europe or the USA but 13K to repair a tower that is several centuries old and in disastrous state for such a measly sum? The cheapest you can find to plaster a 60 square meter tiny apartment in Amsterdam sets you back about 2.000 euros.

The Big Mac Index is a lighthearted index to compare currencies. Using it, I estimate prices in the Czech Republic are half of what they are over here. No way in the world you can restore a 25-year old castle wall that covers some three hectares (7.4 acres) in area for an approximate 22.000 EUR or USD. A hectare is a square of 100 * 100 meters, which means it is enclosed by 800 meters of outer wall. If you're lucky that money covers one percent at best, so something is off.

Elvis has left the building

In her 2016 video on 'What happened to the original OWK?' goddess Amazon explains how the OWK was sold to it's current owner two years ago. That includes the character of queen Patricia.

"This is my personal experience with the current owner of the OWK. He filed a false DMCA take down against me on March 17, 2016. The DMCA notice showed the owner of the OWK as a male. I called a few people who use to work for the OWK before it was sold 2 years ago to verify it. The confirmed that owner of the OWK is indeed a man. He brought the business from Queen Particia in 2014."

Remember David Bramwell, whom I wrote about two years ago? After his hot Italian girlfriend dumps him - she even wears leather pants without him asking! - he decides to take a year of and travel to extraordinary communities all over the world. At the OWK he meets a Japanese guy who runs the kitchen:

"‘Don’t worry about Frank,’ he said, in his melancholic, Eastern European accent, ‘he’s been terribly unhappy since the ladies have left.’

‘Are you saying they’re not coming back?’

‘Yah. The queen fell out with sublime ladies a few weeks ago. They wanted pay rise. She refused. There was enormous cat fight.’ ‘Pffft. Everybody go.’"

'Number Nine Bus to Utopia' is published in June 2014, so it's safe to say queen Patricia descended by 2013 at the latest and is no longer associated with the business in any way. Her departure could also have happened years before. Despite that the OWK claims the kingdom continues to be ruled by queen Patricia.

For at least eight years now the new owners ask slaves to pay tribute to queen Patricia so she can restore the castle to it's former glory. And when they finally manage to repair the tower, queen Patricia immediately sets up the Womania Empire Castle Fund "which will collect funds for the purchase of real estate – the future seat of Womania Empire." Honestly there are easier ways to burn money. Setting it on fire is one of them.

For those who got a bit cross when I wrote about dommes being the product in the OWK, don't worry. Dutch is an equal opportunity offender. Men paying tribute to queen Patricia are even more the product. Did I mention 'product' is a difficult word for 'sucker'? In the wonderful world of the OWK everybody is, hooray!

Queen Patricia moved on long ago and the OWK and it's various sub-brands are now managed by a company that bought the name and fame of queen Patricia to trick people into donating to the cause. Just look at the fine print if you donate towards funding a new castle where the ultra matriarchy can happily live ever after. How 'bout donating to your local women's shelter instead?

Before I go, yes French cleats are hot, [3] not that it has anything to do with femdom. And autarky is a difficult word that means being self-sufficiency, especially regarding economics. Translated into OWK speak it means they grow their own grain, make their own machines, making sure the future seat of the ultra matriarchy is closed of from the rest of the world forever. To which I say excellent. I'll even lock the doors from the outside.

This is not over yet, things are going to get a whole lot worse. It could happen as soon as next month. I'm worried.

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[2] For example I very much doubt there's an 'oncological foundation' with an interest in archeology. Oncology is the branch of medicine that studies cancer. Archeologists analyse really old stuff. Meanwhile badass arsonists just want to burn the place to the ground.

[3] And my power tools are still under lock and key. It's almost three months now. Please mistress?

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