Discovering Your Inner Domme

[By accident]

Prank fail when the team from Salty Mermaid shot a reverse hoodie clip.

Everybody is freaking out over our prank fail on FB & IG, so we figured we’d share it here, too, in honor of April Fool’s Day 😂😂#prank #pranksgonewrong pic.twitter.com/GVQFIGguIc

— Salty Mermaid Entertainment (@saltymermaident) April 1, 2020

Calling All Goddesses

"I told you not to call Ghostbusters."

Some women believe there is not a single man on this planet who likes freckles. We're all entitled to our opinions, but prejudice doesn't equal fact, right OWK? More often than not, the two of them are at logger heads.

In a recent post, femdom blogger Paltego marvels at the technical skills filling out an on-line session form. Good idea or bad? Yes and no. Of course it's efficient, but are on-line session forms also the most effective?

Face Time With Mistress

femdom is sexy.

"Houston, we definitely don't have problem. Wait for Apollo 13, not kidding you. Camera and mic of, please. #11 out."

Sometimes silly guys have all the luck.

Last night my Love and mistress suddenly says we need more face time. Being the super-smart guy I think I know I am for sure, I was perplexed.

"But my One True Love ['n' mistress], webcams are sold out."

Snappy retort: "you're clearly not as smart as you believe you are."

"But, but, but..."
"But you are sitting on the couch next to me!"
"How, what?"

Moments later I find myself on the floor, face up, eager for what comes next. Lucky me, she never disappoints. In fact, the circumstances lead me to believe mistress is looking forward to this as much as I am, only longer.

Why do mistresses have all the [foreplay] fun? So unfair. Don't worry, no regrets, I'm in a happy place and it'll only get better, scout's honour. I'm gonna make this a shared experience [1]. Let's hope my devotion pleases mistress. Dutch signing of, eagerly because I have better things to do.

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[1] Inner voice to self: "If I play my cards right, I end up on the floor tomorrow night and the night after that. And. And. And. Yay!"

A Domme Is Not An Evil Overlord

Obviously "Overlord" is the vanilla equivalent of the Other World Kingdom (OWK). For those ladies and gentlemen that are pure of heart, please ignore.

What comes next is a long story. Did Dutch learn anything? I vaguely remember rule 33 dealing with formal occassions. And something about hot leather outfits, cool! Enter mistress Saint Lawrence [first on the left] - supreme sadist with a heart - and friends.

Clearly I was onto something when I wrote about the new 007 née James Bond. And no, Gillian Anderson doesn't get the part. Literally lost in translation is the fun of the baddie torturing Mr. License to Kill, allowing him to escape before serious harm disables him. Very soon that license will be transferred to a woman and nobody who's into femdom understands the point of making a female slave suffering for her master. There goes the franchise.

Can't remember how I stumbled upon it, but some people do have a lot of free time on their hands. Not one, but two people simultaneously started compiling a list of major pitfalls to be avoided if you want to live happy ever after as an evil overlord. And because I crave to serve, I humbly translate 11 of the best for those mistresses we all worships and obey. Nothing else we can do, once we fall under the spell of our Infallible Overlady. Or is there?

All Hail Spring

Tomorrow. Only one more night. Don't get excited yet. April 2020 starts when you wake up.

Cherry trees in full blossom, accentuating what female supremacy can be all about. Who needs hot leather outfits? Mistress Saint-Lawrence means business in a finely balanced mash-up with spring-time in Tokyo. Gaia is a woman. We men are eternally grateful for that.

Don't know about you, but to me the first day of April always feels kinda special. The Northern Hemisphere where I live, anxiously awaits the arrival of the rebirth of nature. Only a fool disagrees.

On this special day, initially I felt like celebrating the arrival of spring 2020 by writing about die-hard dommes building better-than-brilliant dungeons out of nothing more than tiny Lego blocks. Size 1:1 for good measure that is.

Even a Cane Needs Love

Dark days call for serious science.

We live in dangerous times, mostly because of the fake news that is out to get us. Drinking bleach is not a cure and it never will, it's dangerous. By comparison gargling with salt water or vinegar solution is simply a futile act.

Scientists in unrelated fields have flocked to medicine to help find a solution. Among them are leading brain from the field of femdom. One of them is Frau Doktor Von Whippingstein, a dominant researcher on canes and their effectiveness.

Now that she has joined the fight, Frau Doktor "asked" me to write a preliminary report on the findings of her latest research. Glad to be of service, not that I would dare to disobey her. Just the thought of it scares the hell out of me.

Recently Frau Doktor Von Whippingstein has been studying the life and happiness of canes. As it turns out even canes need love. Not only does a little TLC make them happy, it also makes them at least 11 percent more effective, provided they're put to good use on a regular basis. Still, most slaves would want a little more of mistress' sent their way rather than to her cane. For more than one reason obviously.

Why Men Surrender

It's all about happy femdom, smiling women, Einstein and a hot stove or something.

No man should fight gravity or destiny. Certainly not with that look on her face. Happy femdom. (Image features mistress Barbara of Latin Beauties in High Heels, source unknown)

Femdom is about fun, wrapped in a different colour gift paper than most vanilla prezzies. Despite that, having fun as a slave often feels like giving away your most-prized possession. So why do we keep on suffering?

As always the answer is gravity, female gravity to be exact. Nobody needs hot leather outfits, doesn't hurt either. Neither do looks, skin colour and age matter. Female gravity is about her wow factor. Don't worry when you meet the one, you'll understand.

Handyman

No, this time it's not about power tools. This time it's personal.

Just a friend. Lovely smile, nice hands but very cruel. (Image Serious Images)

Beauty is in the eyes of the beholder. Not gonna bore you with the very definition of what exactly beauty is, or should be. Wise men know female seduction can takes many forms.

A fetish is something you cannot do without, not to be confused with love, roughly translated as the one you shouldn't live without. Preferences are more like saying yes, one of life's little bonuses in an ocean of bling.

For some reason the Dark Side seems unable to swallow me whole. Me stubbornly repeating their are many ways a man can fall under the spell of a woman doesn't help either. Example: being quick on your feet is absolutely gorgeous. So is combining tender care with absolute cruelty. One of the more physical aspects that make women magnificent are their bellies. Yes. Don't ask me why, it's just how it works. Sometimes the slave man just wants to rest his head in her lap after his ordeal is over. Maybe plant a sneak kiss on her belly. Still, that doesn't explain it. Some things are best left unanswered.

First Contact

Her originality makes sparks fly and him suffer

Touchdown! (Image: Lady Margolotta und das Puschel)

Creativity is one of four cornerstones of human happiness. Not that there's a equal 50/50 split when it comes to expressing creativity in kink. Not fair but for some reason, dommes have all the fun. And no, thinking [even] harder about how to worship her is not the same as a creative state of mind. Such are the [deplorable] limits of being a slave. [1]

On the other hand, the dark side is full of spoiled wannabe dommes that lack passion for the real thing. The best they can do is copy the drive and creativity of others. First decade of the millennium water-boarding was all over the news. Part of "our community", let's say irresponsible dommes, picked up on it right away. All of a sudden water-boarding your stable of slaves was hot. Certain players are best avoided.

The Dominant Doctor

"No sweetie, the first rule of being a Timelord is action, not asking what's going on for 45 minutes."

Some love the 13th Doctor, [who?], others don't. Disagree with the lovers. And not just because they're wrong. Mistress is always right and she says I'm never wrong. Let's leave it at that.

As for Marilyn Monroe, she didn't get it either. Certain gentlemen might prefer blondes, but even if, a true gentlemen never tells. Me, a hillbilly from Dutchland prefers awesomeness over the colour of a woman's hair. Please pay attention dear OWK.

Look at the image and tell me who is the dominant Timelord. Hint : it's not some invisible Blond Barbie Girl. Not just because she runs for the safety of her Tardis, so someone else can clean up her mess and save the day by blowing himself up, wiping out an entire planet in the process and perhaps some baddies. A real Timelord is never a coward.

By the way, I also retract my offer writing awesome Doctor Who scripts until showrunner Chris "let's-throw-more-dead-bodies-of-a-cliff" Chibnal resigns. Just don't count on it. Poisoned chalice or not, prestige [BBC, show runner and lead actor] clearly matters more than serving the audience. The current rule of thumb is that terror reigns for a minimum of three seasons.

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Notes:
[0] None, because there are too many. Not even going to mention how Chris Chibnal abuses race for PC-ratings or that this season's finale is actually called "The Timeless Children." None of that. Time to clean HER Tardis with a toothbrush. HER Tardis - not the one of some H2O2 girl lost in space and time.

Tortured Soul

March madness meets electro torture, the beginning of a beautiful friendship?

(don't worry, he's loving it too. Probably. Who cares?)

Looking good!

In the world of femdom blogging the unspoken rule is classy pictures only, whatever that means. Oops, today's image tells the story of a slave on his knees, fully exposed and no way out, closely observed by mistress. She's not only comfortable watching from behind, she can - and inevitably will - send him ever more excruciating messages. That's what's cranking up the fun is all about. All it takes is a single button.