Dungeon Delusions: To Serve is to be Far Away From Her

If not being with your mistress is your idea of what true servitude is all about, have fun. Just make sure your slavecave has a little bit of class.

Bad to the bone might not be the most apt sign above the cage of your selfconfessed solitary confinement. Then again whose happiness we're talking about anyway?

I’m dead against not sleeping in the same bed as the woman I love, and yes that includes mistress. For whatever reason some slaves believe, the more distance you put between mistress and yourself, the deeper the devotion. Digg a tunnel to China! Just make sure you do not come up on the other side, only to discover there are several miles of ocean above you. Blub blub.

Guilty by the Numbers? Beyond the Judgement of Solomon

Jian Ghomeshi, Bill Cosby and now New Year’s Eve in Cologne. Sometimes women do bad things, but mostly it is us men. The Judgement of Solomon obviously doesn not work here. But does character?

If his ass turns red after 11 strokes, he must be guilty. Of what?
Challenging her. Mistress is always right even if she is not. Q.E.D.

Whether you like it or not – consensual BDSM can blur the lines. But for the most part it is straight forward. No means no. Always. Forever. That is why it is called no. Still that does not help.

As I mentioned before, indignation reached peak political correctness in the case of Jian Ghomeshi. The number of female accusers was so overwhelming, he simply must have done it. Most likely. I think. But that is not the same as justice, let alone lock up a predator. Justice needs to prevail for many reasons, making sure a predator no longer roams the streets is one of the most important.

So what does it tell us numerous people come forward, but only after the first does. Apart from the fact that it is difficult to do so, not too much. I’ve been thinking about it a lot. Enter character, aka previous accusations.

Not Big On Begging (Dommes)

Beneficium accipere libertatem est vendere

It does not matter whether a woman dresses up her need for stuff in a nice post or begs for it outright. For some reason, it makes their “natural” dominance hard to swallow.

Prêt-à-porter is so 2015. Time to move on to haute couture girl.

Yes, a woman who receives a prezzy from the man who loves her, that is nice. I’m guilty too and can only hope my guilt increases exponentially over time. But to brag about your dominance, while at the same time beg your devotees. Now there is something wrong with that for me.

More and more women, who enjoy playing the dominant role in femdom games, beg for stuff. The most outlandish ones emphasize the need for slaves to serve with their wallets exclusively. Not only does that attitude make you wonder about the very nature of servitude. It also ask the question whether dominance comes naturally or can be bought whenever the price is right.

Why Kink No Longer Equals Crazy

Once kinky folk were considered mentally ill, because a clinical manual said so. It took a long fight to get rid of that classification.

The DSM is a scary big book, explaining just how crazy you are. It does not matter whether you are really mad or not. If the big book says you are crazy, you are. Until its latest edition BDSM was considered a mental illness. How that affects you, depends on where you live and what your situation is.

A Painful Weather Forecast

A radio DJ who wants to spice up his weather forecast and a cruel suggestion from a sadistic girl.

This is how a taser looked like before they invented electricity

Sometimes sadism is right under your nose. The weather forecast is the most boring part of the news, isn't it? One radio station is trying to spice up things a bit. Not by announcing it's raining men. The DJ invites readers to submit challenges for him while he is reading the weather forecast.

Luxury Handbags. A Better Investment than the Stock Market?

I'm gonna share a secret with you. Just make sure mistress never finds out. The Hermès Birkin handbag has a better long-term return than the S&P 500. Still it is an ugly bag.

"The whole point was to take an icon of consumerism and change it, which is like blasphemy."
Make it idiot proof and somebody will make a better idiot. (Image: The Telegraph)

For the new year I decided to improve the quality of my blog. I began writing about serious stuff like Beauty & The Beast. There are many similiarities with Fifty Shades. Sometimes I feel life is one big cosmic joke. When I finished the post, I discovered the prince was eleven years old when the spell was cast.

Over years I have taken a stance against findom and overpriced luxury items - experiences are a much better investment - only to find out I am wrong. So very wrong.

Safe in Her Arms: Submission Comes in Many Ways

A 1960’s image of a man asleep in the arms of a woman. Happy where he belongs. Me, I not only see love but also his complete surrender to her. She is the woman you love and also your mistress. Today is about submission without pain.

Her hand gently pulls him closer. He remains vast asleep as she plant a gentle kiss on his forehead. Today is for love. Tomorrow is for suffering. (Image by Coby Whitmore)

Let’s keep it simple. She is my mistress and I am her slave. It is part of who we are. Not necessesarily why we are together though. If you can make a relationship work with an extra layer of complexity, it only adds to its beauty. It becomes a source of joy. I was thinking of that as I discovered this image. I love it.

Fifty Shades is Beauty & The Beast All Over

"...for who could ever learn to love a beast?"

A while ago I discover this beautiful image by artist Andrew Tarusov. Belle in full control of her Beast. Disney wouldn’t approve but it is clearly femdom related. Then all of a sudden it hit me. Beauty & the Beast is exactly the same as Fifty Shades. Think about it.

She will set him free – from his current form. Despite his grumpiness  he follows her lead. I do not understand why The Beast doesn’t look happier. He should, Belle is.(Image: Disney pin-up princess by Andrew Tarusov)

Even the most diehard Fifty Shades fan is disappointed by how the story ends. Sadist abuses innocent young girl. Young girl blossoms into a woman despite everything and domesticates wealthy sadist. In the end it didn’t turn out to be his fault at all. It was his childhood.

Horror-Silvesternacht: 1000 Men Assault 100 Women

Last year the BDSM community almost universally condemned Jian Ghaneshi before he was charged. The same thing happened with Bill Cosby, who was finally charged recently. On New Year's Eve 100 women were assaulted. You probably haven't heard about it.

Not nearly as festive as it looks. (Image Marie Claire)

The Court of Popular Opinion always fails
Who needs due process if the number of accusers is high enough? If that many women come forward he must have done it. My writing discussed how the case would influence the general public’s view on BDSM. I was almost excommunicated from the kink community for not following the party line. Those who didn’t toe the line, all received likes from the femdom police on their Fetlife account.

Essence of Femdom: Wonderful Goddess in Red

"Hot babe in sexy outfit" That is how the vanilla world describes femdom. What else can you do if you cannot conceive the image symbolizes a whole world behind it. The dark side runs much deeper than just hot babes in sexy outfits. For the second time in my life I was flabberghasted by the image of a woman. A dame oozing strength and dominance, without a hint of leather or rubber.

Nope it wasn't this image. So impressed, I forgot to bookmark (Image source NA)

Most visitors probably end up here, in search of hardcore stuff. Don't worry, one day. Femdom is much more than that. A couple of days ago I saw a beautiful image of a domme radiating nothing but raw power. Her strength was palpable just by looking at your screen. She had an intimidating aura around her. Not menacing, just a heads up with a touch of fear. Promise or threat? It depends. Bloody gorgeous and highly erotic too. Pardon my language.

Eleven things about 2015

My first post of 2015 was a list of kinky New Year’s resolutions – kinda tongue in cheek. It received a large number of hits that continued all through the year.  It surprised me. Most people have no clue who Dutch is. On top of that it is pretty personal.

It is exactly what it looks like.

New Year’s resolutions can be a good thing, even if you break them on day one. They help you reflect on what matters whatever caught your attention. Below 11 things about 2015.

Love and femdom make strange bedfellows
Desire is a sadist par excellence. People in femdom-oriented relationship confuse lust for love more often than their vanilla peers. Quite frequently things don’t work out and I read quite a few blogpost dealing with just that.