I Logged Into Fetlife

Again

[OK, last time was long ago]

"I bought 1.100 euro stuff on Temu/Ali/Fet, [1] let's see how good it is. Go on Youtube and get bombarded with titles like this. Not only zero orginality but also boring to the max.

Social media have never been my thing. Desperately 'liking' whatever someone else posts? No, thank you. Don't worry that ain't gonna happen. At least not right away. Dutch forgot his password. That's odd, even before I remember I don't remember my password, Fetlife already seems to know who I am. Why else say 'Welcome home, we've missed you big time. Does that mean Fetlife is tracking me even when I'm logged out. Or is it that they are lying to me and greet everyone who logs in like this. Or is it only those with an IP adress from the Netherlands, which might be a good thing, I agree. Still. 

And Facebook is the most popular book ever written.

"We've missed you?"Guess the feeling isn't mutual. Oops.

Being on the naughty list makes you lose face in 'our' community dear Fetlife.

Still trying to verify. Just because.

Resetting my password is more difficult than it seems. Apparently Fetlife is in a bad place of it's . The site is blacklisted in Peter Lowe's add and tracking server list, which usually means the website you're heading for is dodgy at best. Let's risk it. I take the plunge and am rewarded with a new follower. Number two or so I guess. What have I done to deserve this. Naughty Andre - not to be confused with Andre 3000 - started following me somewhere in the last 111 months or so. Nobody knows why, certainly not Mr. Naughty himself. Andre is around my age but with more hair, hippy style. Funny thing his hair is black. He also sports a beard, a grey one - one colour of that. Andre's other stats are

Straight
Pronouns - He/Him
Active
Curious And Want To Try
Looking for - Long-term Relationship
Relationship
Play Partner
Mistress
Dominant
Friendship
Community
Events

So, looking for relationships, long-term relationships, community and events? All I can tell my new best fetastic friend: keep on trucking, I mean looking. Now let's try Facebook. Dutch is old enough to know that's where the really cool stuff is. You don't fool me.

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Face the Music

Het Goede Doel - Belgie

Saturday evening and I'm make dinner as we speak. Silly music on the radio. Really? Of course not, one of my all-time favourite songs is playing: Belgie. The band's name is Het Goede Doel [the Charity] and they are wondering where once can hide. And remember this is the mid 1980's when Dutch was still little. Turns out Belgium is the only place they seriously consider. The person who wrote this must have been really smart because Belgium is, was and always will be an excellent choice. Lovely song too.

Goede Doel - Belgie [click to listen]

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1053

It's been 1.053 days since Russia invaded Ukraine. These past three years keep on reminding me of the beginning of the Second World War.

In March 1938, Austria became a part of Germany in the Anschluss. Ater that Hitler's Nazi Germany eyed the Sudetenland region of Czechoslovakia. " With three million ethnic Germans, the Sudetenland represented the largest German population outside the Reich[98] and Hitler began to call for the union of the region with Germany." Any similarity with the Russian arguments for invading Ukraine are not accidental. In the end Britains's Parliamentary "Foreign Policy Committee chose to advocate that Czechoslovakia be urged to make the best terms it could with Germany. All the rest is history. Like the trip British Prime Minister Chamberlain took to Germany in September of 1938, returning 'triumphantly', rambling about peace in our time. Whose peace? What does peace even mean if you cannot choose freely and of your own will. History has the nasty habit of repeating itself if you don't study it's lessons.

Slava Ukraini.

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Notes

[1] Promise, one day I'm gonna write about the elven coolest things on Temu under 11 euro's that are perfect for your dungeon. One day, don't hold your breath. 

[2] Last time Dutch logged onto Fetlife was in 2018. Fetlife was already dead then. At the time I was greeted by a happy note that said 'it's verification time baby."  Naive, silly and not in the interest of 'our' community. Tells you all.

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When the Jerry Springer Show Dominated Talk TV

Yes, technically it is a 'talk' show

#NeverNormal forever

Outrageous guilty pleasure? You mean the Jerry Springer Show, don't you?

Netflix has a new two-part documentary out about the Jerry Springer Show, the talkshow that changed it all. Soon after it's launch in 1992 the program seemed headed for oblivion, being just one of many talkshows on television. In order to save the show, in 1994 it changed into what can only be called a freak show.  Adultery and other relationship issues were now the norm and the supposed solution was to solve it with your fists, live on stage. When deemed necessary producers baited guests to slug it out. Cheating and strippers were common but the show is most remembered for bizarre episodes such as I left my wife and daughters to marry a horse. Another episode featured a woman who cut of her legs because she didn't feel she needed them anymore. And of course there were always the confrontations but no limits.

"Springer was born in the London Underground station of Highgate in 1944 in World War Two. His parents, who were Jewish refugees from a region of Germany which is now part of Poland, were in the station sheltering from a German bombing raid at the time." In one episode the program "pitted members of the Ku Klux Klan against members of the Jewish Defence League in a debate, which devolved into a physical brawl." Mr. Springer passed away in 2023. In the musical Jerry Springer: The Opera, which ran from 2003 to 2006, "the talkshow host ends up in hell after being shot by a nappy-wearing fetishist aiming at the KKK."

Foot fetish on the Jerry Springer Show

Adult baby fetish on the Jerry Springer Show

Food fetish on the Jerry Springer Show

The Jerry Springer Show ran for 27 years and there isn't a fetish or taboo that wasn't discussed. There were food fetishes, foot fetishes, lots of them ["I love feet, don't leave me], adult babies, men who love diapers and of course several episodes featuring dominatrixes. In "Attack of the Tattoed People" submissive Randy's secret is revealed to his wife who goes on to beat his dominatrix mistress to a pulp. No doubt Randy loved being humiliated on TV. The one that everybody remembers is the mother-daughter dominatrix duo. [1] Of course their slave is brought out and they play with him, the women seem to genuinely enjoy it, only for his girlfriend to come out and berate him. "No, no, no. If you're gonna be anybody's bitch you're gonna be my bitch." Either this guy is extremely lucky or the episode is scripted. By someone who has an intimate knowledgde of BDSM.

Mistress Mommy approves.

Sometimes everybody wins on the Jerry Springer show. A young woman graduates in about three months from college. This is my last chance to experiment and be wild she worries. She has a girlfriend and also a crush on another woman. She is desperate for "hot kinky sex". Of course the show not only brings out her crush but also her girlfriend. For once  on Jerry Springer everybody goes home happy.

Final thoughts. If a slave prepares himself for a session, e.g. by using soap or shaving where it counts, why do women seem to forget to ready themselves for the Jerry Springer Show? Tie your hair in a knot, because that's what girls always go after first in a fight. And whatever you do, don't wear a dress or high heels. Take care everyone.

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Face the Music

Cyril - Stumbling In

One of the biggest hits of 2024 is Stumbling In by Cyril. The Australian DJ has a knack for remixes. In fact his version of Stumbling In is full of samples from the original by Suzi Quatro & Smokie singer Chris Norman (1978).

Cyril - Stumbling In [click to listen]

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1050

Incredible, after almost three years after Russia invaded Ukraine, we still don't support Ukraine the way we should. Meanwhile we let Russian spy ships trash cables and other vital infrastructure. We're not naive, the West is stupid.

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Notes

[1] To be honest, it feels a lot like mum is dominating her daughter too.

[2] Look at those episode titles, someone clearly did a brilliant job. How about 'We're practicing for porn', 'She signed the side chick contract' or 'Open Marriage Causes Chaos' [who could've guessed?]. As for "You Can't Pet My Snake No More", I haven't seen it but it's probably not what you think it is. "He Plays with Toys While She Plays with His Friend" sounds a lot like Dumb & Dumber Part III. If you think that's silly, how about "Stripper Sex Turned Me Straight"? "Talk to the Hot Dog" is the sort of title only a guy can come up with. Very funny though. How about "Nacho Man"? Don't ask, not a clue. Somebody is clearly not into chastity: "Sex is my favourite sport". "Surprise, she's cheating on you". What surprise, it's the Jerry Springer Show. "Lesbians wrestling in apple sauce". Whatever. And before I share the last one, please remember I'm not a die-hard researcher, so I selected these by looking at the titles on Youtube. How 'bout "Dropping Truth Bombs"? On Jerry Springer. Really?

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Muse Naadia

No leather required

Blog for a while and you run the risk of getting confused by your own writing. A while back I came across this lovely image. And because femdom is often used trying to sell stuff, I wondered, is this a lingerie ad or a pro-domme with a style I enjoy very much.

Good news, turns out to be the latter. The image is by Muse Naadia, an American pro-domme. Her photos feel like a fresh breath of air. Looking for the 'about me' section on her website, I realized the texts need some upgrading to match the superb creative quality of her images. It all started in 2019 when Muse Nadeaa was listening to a findom-themed podcast and decided to try it. To her own surprise, she liked it. One year later she is a top featured star on " AVN, a top clip artist on iWC and just getting started with ManyVids and Clips4Sale."

Another image of Muse Naadia. Dutch can't resist women in white

Maybe not such a surpise because whenever creativity meets a strong personality, magic can happen. I've seen it before and yes I'm priviliged and beyond. With hindsight I feel ashamed. So much creativity, such elegance, way above the creative genius of even the world's best copy writer. But that Mrs. Naadia is many muses combined into one I have no doubt.

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Face the Music

Sugar Hill Gang - Rapper's Delight

Sugar Hill Gang - Rapper's Delight [click to listen]

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1034

What is there left to say? President Biden is sending as much weapons as he can before Donald Trump is sworn in as the next president of the United States. Doesn't even cover too little too late. Meanwhile European politician are exhausting themselves to beat president-elect Trump to the finish line. Suddenly they all want to negotiate a peace settlement between Ukraine and Russia. A 'peace' settlement in which Ukraine gives up huges swathes of territory. And why? Because we didn't stand by Ukraine when we had the chance. Former East-bloc countries like Poland, which has suffered under Russian terror for centuries, itself but also the Baltic states tried to warn us. We didn't listen. Let's not antagonise Putin, he's not a nice person. Of course he ain't. Just don't forget, we're the bad guys here too. There is no easy way out when it comes to war and agression. The only way you can potentially win is to look at longterm consequences. Remember secondary school where that bully beat up everybody for lunch money. When did it end? Never? And why is that, you think. Ah, because nobody stood up to him? Exactly. Putin's Russia won't stop, nor will other hostile nations. Russia is already dipping it's toe into NATO territory, looking for fight or flight. Will the rest of Europe and NATO really stand by our friends in Poland [cause that's what they are!] and other countries when Putin starts to bully them or do we coward and do nothing, hoping it will all go away. We didn't design this world but we all have to live in it, so act accordingly. Late is not the same as too late. To surrender on paper doesn't mean you cannot carry on the fight by other means. The future of Europe is not won in Paris or Berlin but in Warschau, Kiev, Tallinn, Riga, Vilnius and all those other former East-bloc countries. They have experienced what it is to live under Russian rule, don't know the details but one thing I can tell you, it's bad. And most likely Putin won't try to go all the way but image  just how many young people of whatever European country have to die to stop him. All because we didn't stand by Ukraine when we could and should. And yes, no whitelines. Now you know how it feels to be trapped.

Slava Ukraini

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Lady MacLaine: 30 Years Behind the Whip

A German pro-domme retires

Lady MacLaine [left] and Katja Inga Baldowski as Lady MacLaine

Back in the mid 1990 a friend of mine moved into the same building as mistress Madieanne and was offered a tour of her premises. If it were me I would have jumped on the opportunity, but I think she declined. In Berlin, 30 years ago something similar happened.  "Many years ago, Tina moved into a Berlin apartment building and created a dominatrix studio on the ground floor, where she became known as Lady MacLaine. Unlike many of her colleagues and despite personal crises and gambling addiction, she worked in the industry for over three long decades."

When movie director Rosa von Praunheim moved into the same apartment building as dominatrix Lady MacLaine in the 1990s, they became friends and now that Lady MacLaine has retired [and moved to the country side] a film about her life and work as a professional dominatrix has been made, called 30 Years Behind the Whip [30 Jahre hinter der Peitsche]. It recently premiered at the Internationale Hofer Filmtage.  The life of Lady MacLaine is presented as a docu drama, not exactly sure what that means but some dungeon scenes are re-enacted with actress Katja Inga Baldowski as Lady MacLaine. The movie is accompanied by a book of the same title, or is it the other way around? Doesn't matter. Seems to be a continuation of 20 Jahre hinter der Peitsche. Despite the fact that it is subsidized by both the European Union and German Public Broadcasting, it's almost impossible to watch it. Dutch lives in neighbouring Holland and so far has had little luck.

Reviews are overwhelming positive but there is a catch. Local broadcaster Bayerische Rundfund [BR] is one of those positive reviews. It, however, cannot hide it's surprise that a woman can work her whole adult life as a pro-domme and retire like anyone else.

"Despite personal crises and her gambling addiction, Tina held on to her career as Lady MacLaine for over three decades and managed to retire unscathed. Her intelligence and middle-class background helped her - in contrast to many of her colleagues who met tragic ends." [1]

Never understood the disrepect pro-dommes get both from the vanilla world and the haters within 'our' community. Nobody forces you to visit a pro-domme but if you're curious about BDSM there's probably no safer way to learn more about it than booking that first session with an experienced domme. It's probably one of the best life choices you'll ever make and Lady Maclaine is one of many dommes making that possible. I'm glad she decided to publish her life story. Now all I have to do is look for a chance to watch it.

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Face the Music

Jaden Bojsen & David Guetta - Let's Go

Jaden Bojsen & David Guetta - Let's Go [click to listen]

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1003

US President Joe Biden has given Ukraine permission to launch longer range missiles into Russia, two months before the end of his term. Russia not only has some 10.000 North Korean troops added to its military strength but also is making sizeable gains against Ukraine. Incoming US President Donald Trump has vowed to end the war within 24 hours, which seems impossible. Most likely he will halt aid to Ukraine, forcing the country to negotiate a peace settlement where they give up terrain. It explains the fierce battle that is going on in what might be the last months of the war. Both sides are trying to grab as much land as possible the gain a better bargaining position. And yes that effectively means that Russia is rewarded for starting a war against Ukraine and we, the West, failed both Ukraine and ourselves. Only question is what will Putin do after his 'victory'. This is far from over and the Russian president is not done yet.

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Notes

[1] "Trotz persönlicher Krisen und ihrer Spielsucht hielt Tina als Lady MacLaine über drei Jahrzehnte hinweg in ihrem Beruf durch und schaffte es, unbeschadet in den Ruhestand zu gehen. Ihre Intelligenz und bürgerliche Herkunft halfen ihr dabei - im Gegensatz zu vielen ihrer Kolleginnen, die tragisch endeten."

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The Stanford Prison Experiment

When being a prisoner femdom style feels safer than participating in a scientific experiment

Last month Philip Zimbardo passed away. Most likely that name doesn't ring a bell but perhaps the Stanford Prison Experiment does. In 1971 a group of 24 volunteers was divided into 12 guards and 12 inmates. The 1971 psychological experiment was designed to study participants' reactions and behaviors in a prison environment over the course of 14 days. However from the very start guards became increasingly brutal in their tactics to stop the prisoners from escaping. Christina Maslach visited the experiment on day six and was troubled by what she saw. The psychologist confronted Zimbardo, who played the role of superintendant and as such was in charge of the guards. He ended the experiment that same day.

Today many consider the Stanford Prison Experiment to be unethical. One element that directly casts doubt on it's scientific merit is the fact that those who responded to the ad, mostly did so for monetary gain, making the pool of participants all but random. Volunteers were paid $15 per day, roughly equal to $113 in 2023, meaning that for the whole fortnight, participants were paid $1862 for the full duration of the experiment. Zimbardo also "instructed guards to find ways to dominate the prisoners, not with physical violence, but with other tactics, verging on torture, such as sleep deprivation and punishment with solitary confinement", thereby directly intervening in the outcome of his very own research project.

The project went of the rails so bad that when one participant staged a hunger strike, the other prisoners, rather than considering this inmate a hero "and following along in his strike, they chanted together that he was a bad prisoner and a troublemaker."

Looking back half a century later, a consensus that seems to be forming is not so much that William Golding was right in 1954 when he wrote Lord of the Flies [2]  [he was not] but that the guards were led towards extreme behaviour by Zimbardo himself. Not only did Dr. Zimbardo not stop his guards, he even instructed them in the way they should behave. Nature or nurture, the answer will forever be blowing in the wind.

For quite some time now I've been wondering about the recent increase in the popularity of prison play -  or so it seems. Then again perhaps it's not so much that whole prison scene but the warden in chief and her crew behind it. The question that remains is what happens to a man, how does his attitude change, when he signs up voluntarily for femdom prison? One day, one day I'll tell you.

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Face the Music

Interesting article in the Financial Times about the Doctor Who theme song.

Delia Derbyshire, who helped create the Doctor Who theme in 1965.

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988

Support Ukraine!

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Notes

[1] Keep in mind that the standards in the 1970s for scientific experiments were different from today.

[2] In the novel Lord of the Flies boys turn into beasts after their plane crashes on a deserted island.

[3] In the real Lord of the Flies, six boys are shipwrecked for 15 months. Rather than fight for power, they cooperate. “One day, in 1977, six boys set out from Tonga on a fishing trip ... Caught in a huge storm, the boys were shipwrecked on a deserted island. What do they do, this little tribe? They made a pact never to quarrel.”

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Safeword Expired

Yes mistress Robot?

Too much of femdom is all about getting your fix where the other one is a means to an end, no more, a prop at best. Where's the point in that? Same thing with AI. You can dream up the most awesome dominatrix but she will never exist, never be real. It's all a waste of time. Real femdom is about real people, but clearly I'm in the minority here.

The other day I ran into this cartoon, it's in German. It reminded me just how pointless AI is. The slave is using his safeword Erdbeertorte [strawberry cake]. The iDomina-3000 robot tells him that his safeword has expired an he has to contact his administrator. I just think it's funny [1]

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Notes

[1] What's also funny, most likely unintended, is that i-Domina starts with a lower case letter. The robot adresses the slave as you. In German there is something called the polite form of personal pronouns. There is an informal version of ‘you’ (du) and a formal one (Sie). Sie is written in capitals. Guess which form the robot uses.

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That [non-AI] Vibe

Body language is the best.

Yes, today's title is courtesy of Paltego. The author of the Femdom Resource blog writes how he is disappointed with the progress of femdom AI. Mostly copycat output rather than expanding the realm. There's a reason for that. AI cannot feel, it just calculates, copies and extrapolates. Paltego says as much himself in his September 24 post where he confesses his need for close physical contact, illustrated by a lovely image of domina M and a slave. [1]

It's the Matrix all over again. Red pill or blue pill? Rough reality or hot dreams in which desires come true. For me - and from what I read also Paltego - femdom is about girl meets boy and ties him up. He feels her heat on his skin and then nothing. Or perhaps some burning hot sensation, often followed by a wicked smile. Then some more. What's not to love? [Afterwards.] Femdom is an intimate game for two, sometime more. The desire for flesh on flesh, even if it's fully clothed shows as much. Some say football [soccer] is the beautiful game but to me femdom is. When you truly connect, even if only for a moment, it breaks down each and every barrier in its way, whether it is gags, blindfolds or mere basic bondage. Just make sure such a precious vibe can bounce back and forth. Eat that AI.

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Face the Music

Minnie Riperton - Loving You

Lyrics are really not that important when it comes to how a song makes you feel. Had to think for a moment for today's track but I think I found a true gem. Minnie Riperton wrote Loving You together with her husband. It reached number one on the US charts in 1975. The next year she was diagnosed with breast cancer. Minnie Ripperton was one of the first celebrities to go public with a breast cancer diagnosis. "In 1977, she became a spokesperson for the American Cancer Society. In 1978, she received the American Cancer Society's Courage Award, which was presented to her at the White House by President Jimmy Carter." She passed away at the age of 31 in 1979. Her daughter Maya Rudolp, the SNL actress was seven years old at the time.

In the 1990s someone rehashed this classic into a house track, which is how I came to know of it. Shortly before, in the late 1980s, the vocoder, a device that can make anyone sing like an angel, was introduced. Most people remember 'Believe', the 1989 song by Cher with over the top processing. Because today's topic is femdom, human connection vs. AI I found it important to pick a song from an era where you actually needed talent to sing.

"Lovin' You" was the last release from her 1974 gold album titled Perfect Angel. As a matter of fact I also know an angel, a perfect angel, and that's all I'm gonna share.

Minnie Riperton - Loving You [click to listen]

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965

The fourth series of the TV series Blackadder is set during the Great War. Its final episode holds one of the most impressive scenes I've ever seen. American shows usually have a happy ending, Blackadder Goes Forth, however, is British. If it doesn't make you cry, it will make you  sad.

Me being 11, AKA 1+1, there are two reasons why I bring this up. In the series authority figures contendedly send their subordinates to face the enemy, while unwilling to do so themselves. "Glorious war etc., bla bla bla." I was reminded of Russian President Vladimir Putin, doing something similar. Everybody remembers the long table he hid behind during Covid, although some say the table was just long enough not to get hit by bullets from a printed 3D gun. Also to Putin, the army is nothing but a meat grinder, similar to the ones during World War I.

Russia invaded Ukraine on 24 februari 2022, when winter was almost over. Last year was the first full year of trench warfare, not seen since World War I and this winter will be the second. All of that pain and suffering would have been unnecessary if we stood by Ukraine from the very beginning. Sadly I feel there is a strong resemblance between the generals and marshals of Blackadder and us, we talk big words from a safe distance, hoping someone else will chase the bogeyman away. When did that ever work?

Fields of Flanders.

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Notes

[1] Don't worry, both Paltego and I are on the same page when it comes to femdom. Intimacy and forging a connection are big parts of the game for me too. [2]

[2] Although vibe not necessarily equals personal gravity they are in the same realm. [3]

[3] More simply said, femdom is about a woman and a man, not a computer and some guy. Let's be honest, where's the point in that?

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