You've Got Mail

As a male sub I'm slightly amused by the rambling messages other subs send me, begging for the opportunity to serve. When you are a domme it must be very annoying. Some examples from my inbox.

Watch and learn...

That Alpha Thing

A few days ago I read a post by a well-known American pro-domme. It was your usual alpha rant - with a twist. Whenever I see the word "alpha" I get upset before I've even read the article. This time was no different.

The dominatrix expected her potential clients to devote their lives to something bigger than themselves: HER. Just the sheer fact you consider yourself an alpha personality is enough to get me cross. For one, I truly believed that any alpha worth the name will never refer to herself as such. Imagine how silly that would be. A "true" alpha surveys the landscape and divides it in those they are going have to fight for supremacy and those that will surrender without hesitation.

Shibari You Can Use

A book on bondage techniques might just be the thing to get you started.

By chance I stumbled upon a book about Shibari. Bondage is one of the things I enjoy and the possibilities that rope offers are endless. Despite that I prefer leather cuffs - let's say it's a different kind of menace.

The Black and White Uniform

Can a conventional dress - or colour combination - also be "apropriate" domme outfit?

Throughout this blog I have confessed to several femdom 'sins'. Last year for example, I admitted that I love toys. Like most slaves I enjoy dommes in 'traditional' outfits. Traditional being leather and latex uniforms. Just remember a like is not a necessity.

Memoires of a Heroin-Addicted Dominatrix

When a newspaper article puts the emphasis on a woman's years working as a dominatrix instead of the woman she has become.

If that headline isn't click-bait, I don't know what is. Today British newspaper The Guardian has an article on Melissa Febos, an academic who worked as a professional dominatrix when she was in college. She also struggled with heroin addiction during those years. My initial reaction was: "here we go again."

Stealing Her Happiness

Any man worth the name would give up his soul for the woman he loves. Unfortunately that is a far cry from the average slave who obeys his mistress. No matter how you look at it, love is superior. Always and forever.

Kink is not a choice, it is part of who you are. It's also one of many reasons why Fifty Shades is no more than just another silly novel. Unfortunately, we, the choosen ones, pay a price for our alternative sexual orientation. That price comes in many ways. Just think about the vast hoards of dommes roaming the hills and valleys of Fetlife for that one unicorn, they praise as the perfect slave. Meanwhile on the other side of them hills where the grass is inevitably greener, those very same slaves disown themselves in search of that one, last available siren, the woman they - one day - are privileged to call mistress.

Secret Society of Sadistic Secretaries SOS Part V: The 400 to 1 Grand Finale

The 400 to 1 Grand Finale.

Part Five of the Secret Society of Sadistic Secretaries. Part Four: Here

A fictional tale about a real world secret


In between individual presentations and the panel discussion that would wrap up the convention, the organization had planned a bit of entertainment. Yes, that is correct: more fun at my expense. My services were called upon once again. Well, not exactly called upon, nor summoned. I was simply there, tied up with no way out. On top of that I was exhausted from the non-stop carnage I'd endured all morning.

As always: No way out.

As a guy who considers kink to be a liberal interpretation of sex and hence women, the whole thing had been an emotional drain from the start. On top of that I was worn down physically. Her smile - and the occasional sparkle in her eye - is what kept me going. Not that it prepared me for what was to come.

Silly Science: BDSM as a Tourist Destination

When science turns to studying BDSM, the results are more than a bit odd. Nobody compares BDSM to tourism.

Not suited for accidental tourists.

We all are who we are. Our sexuality is for the most part genetically defined. Despite that BDSM is a long way from being generally accepted. Let me give you a recent example. According to IT website The Register: "A prominent contributor to the open source Drupal content management system has been asked to distance himself from project because his belief system is inconsistent with [the] project's goals."

Trust

A domme who is able to control her sadism when necessary inadvertently reveals her inner strength in a way few people ever will.

 

Trying to explaing what the kinky comfort zone means to me, I realized there is another element in femdom I cherish: the deep bond between two people under the most adverse of circumstances.

Trust is hard. We all got burned in the past. We will all get burned in the future. Despite that, stop trusting others is the worst we can do. Trust matters. Trust, but be smart about it. Especially when it comes to S&M and you are literally helpless, when you find yourself at the mercy of your mistress.

Fifty Shades Darker

They just had to do it, again.

This February, two years ago, I pitied the fool who got tickets to see the original "Fifty Shades" movie on Valentine's Day. I even came up with a list of movies to see instead. I'm quite sure watching "Fifty Shades" wreaked havoc - of a different kind - on many a relationship. Unintended consequences and so on.

Fifty Shades Darker (Image: The New York Times)

San Francisco Armory: From Kink HQ to Musical Venue

end of an era

The Armory is a BDSM movie studio - a haven perhaps - that stands out for its educational qualities. The 200.000 sq foot building will soon be converted into a musical theatre. Yet the tune of femdom movies will continue to go on in Las Vegas.

The San Franciso Armory - Most likely successor to the OWK

After watching the final episode of Sherlock, series four, I began to fantasize where to relocate the Other World Kingdom (OWK) to. The idea came to me after seeing a top secret prison facility on the show - don't ask.