Thanks for nothing Mr. Musk
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| Dutch' birthday bash in full swing. Hardcore. If only. (image: Divine Bitches) |
Hardcore hangover. What else can I say? My birthday bash was beautiful. Until my alarm went of the next morning. Without 44 billion in the bank. At least this time I didn't wake up with a pillow in my arms instead of her. So not complaining if it was her instead. Empty arms hurt much more than an empty bank account. Some guys have all the luck.
For several months now I've been haunted by orphanages far and near. Wherever, whenever, they're all looking for donations. No doubt some female readers can relate. It's akin to the number of - uhm - carrot pics the average domme with a working email address receives on a daily basis. And boy, it's ugly. No, not that, the hungry orphans, whose images my new best friends have lifted of the internet in order to seduce me.
Before I answer what I wouldn't do with 44 billion, let me reassure you that I have [had] this whole thing planned to perfection. After all the [femdom] future of humanity depends on it. So, tons of ideas. Below are 11 random grabs from my long list of brilliant plans for when Day 44 comes. If only.
1. First one I already mentioned. Free leather pants for all women.
2. And who doesn't like a bit of cheating? No world peace I said. I'll throw in a full year of world peace with each pair of leather pants. Latest poll suggest there are about four billion women gracing the green grass of Gaia, humanity will be fine for a while. No need to thank me. Blame E.
Every little bit helps. You know who you really should thank? Miss Argentina and Miss Puerto Rico. They met at the Miss World contest several years ago and fell in love. It happens to all of us. Feel free to thank Gaia. Of course the ladies kept it silent until after they got married. Congratulations. Which is great because now a bunch of sub-zero young males no longer have to lust over the [newly wed] women of their dreams. Wake up and move on. Smell reality! Actual women who are interested to get to know you a little better. No promises. Crawl out of mummy's basement. Risk and rejoice. Stop choosing to be an incel. Buy soap, read the instructions carefully and use it to free yourself. More on that later. Item seven.
3. For at least a year now 'our community' has been buzzing with all that is Leather Goddesses of Phobos. Time to find out the truth. Musk wants to go to Mars, Dutch' destiny is Phobos, one of the red planet's moons. Fund research to find out whether the Leather Goddesses of Phobos are real. Won't say 11 is haunting me, more like a blessing in disguise, but ever since I started this blog, it hits me whenever I least expect it. Like when I first looked up Phobos. NASA states the nearest Martian moon has a radius of 11 km. Definitely didn't see that one coming. Makes research into the Leather Goddesses all the more relevant. Mars can wait!
4. Start my own chain of BDSM hotels, inspired by Tokyo's Alpha Inn. Everybody knows why. When I visited Japan I sessioned in Tokyo with an awesome woman who is also a wonderful domme. Who says slaves can't get lucky? Trust me. Booked a local love hotel for an hour or two. Highly recommend it. It's clean, pleasant, safe and without any of the lewdness that usually accompanies something similar in the West. Not everybody has a dungeon at home and not everyone sees a pro-domme but what if the two of you could rent a dungeon for a couple of hours, five star hotel quality of course? Our community needs this.
5. Move the OWK to some better place like the Italian town of Rimini on the Adriatic coast. Everybody knows why. And yes I'm repeating myself here. Last Saturday the temperature hoovered around three plus Celsius in Holland. Hello Winter. In Černá it's minus five degrees. That's why.
6. For the next 11 years sponsor the BBC with 11 million per Doctor Who episode. Even if it means they bring back Jody Whitaker. I'm just the sponsor. Only string attached is an annual top notch documentary on Her Royal Highness Noor Inayat Khan. Not that the BBC is not already planning that. I assume.
7. How 'bout free soap for all men? I don't want to get us guys jealous. Girls getting leather pants and so on, for free. And all we man can do is watch girls go by. Hmmm. Awesome idea, just needs better phrasing. Still talking about soap, no worries.
8. But before I bring back leather pants for women, how about bringing back 'our girls? Not that anybody remembers them. And yes, if you search for 'bring back our girls', Google is your friend. When was the last time that happened? Meanwhile, where are all those online celebrities when you need them most?
9. With 44 billion at my disposal I could easily fund the entire redevelopment of the Warsaw Prison. That's wrong. It's why I would only buy a couple of shares, giving other people the chance to support lady Daria's too. And yes, you still can. Who says there's no camaraderie among slaves? Just remember: Dutch cares.
The first batch of B shares of 470.000 pln is fully subscribed. Converted from Polish Zloty to Euro that is about € 100.000. In a subsequent funding round lady Daria has issued additional B1 shares in the order of 100.000 - 150.000 pln allocated to some extra work. Better hurry.
10. Covid-19 has wreaked havoc on the global pro-domme community and with 44 billion to make the world a better place- I'm here to help. In 2015 I wrote about my badass plan for a trip around the world in 80 dommes. Any day now. And because I'm devoted to the global femdom community, it's not gonna be 80 but 1100 dommes. Piece of cake for a twue alpha male slave thingy like myself. Oh wait, remember what I wrote back then? "The journey starts with a friendly domme who looks after my personal safety during my 80 shades of traveling the globe." Postponing my trip for now. Some say this should be item 11. Disagree. We have other plans for that.
11. What's the difference between Shania Twain and queen Patricia of the OWK? And please don't say that [question] doesn't impress me much. We all know what Shania Twain looks like. Hot! With or without leather pants. And no, dear incel, not that. No leather pants means she's wearing something else. Get that soap out of your eyes. Grow up. Queen Patricia on the other hand is relegated to the dustbin of femdom history, her spirit wandering the cold, cold halls of the Other World Kingdom. Why, you ask? Because her ungrateful daughter wanted to make her own choices rather than inherit the leftovers of what once was her mother's dream.
Now imagine something else. What if my 44 billion would actually get 'our girls' back home. Ignore for a moment the years that have passed. Some of those returning will be young women by now. Young women who were denied to choose for themselves. Otherwise they would have learned to read and write. Still, what if my 44 billion could set them free? What kind of life awaits them? Let's hope they become Girls Not Brides. That impresses even Shania Twain.
HEY, at least I'm not getting turned into a Dalek Nazi from outer space [4] so
let's move on to our encore.
Q: What wouldn't you do with that money Dutch?
A: Buy power tools. If my
Love and mistress says no, I wouldn't go behind her back. It's wrong. And not
because I love her
Anyway my Love and mistress gave me back my power tools today [11-11]. "Not because it's [y]our 'other' birthday but because of urgent repairs to our [sic!] dungeon."
"Poor me another glass, will you baby?
Oh, wait.
Empty?
Let's
go bed."
Sigh. [Thought you'd never ask.]
And that girls and boys is how my Love returned my power tools that night, I mean day. Oops.
The end.
Face the music
The obvious choice today is Shania Twain, so here we go: "That don't impress me much."
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Shania Twain - That don't impress me much [click to listen] |
But wait, it's my birthday. Let's make it a double bill because 1 + 1 = 2. You'll never guess this one: Andy Williams - Music to watch girls by.
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| Andy Williams - Music to watch girls by [click to listen] |
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[1] Anyone knows whether Mr. badge-access guy returned to work [for Elon Musk]?
[2] Post Elon butchers the blue bird that was Twitter: those who claim my writing lacks realism, are you sure?
[4] I hate outer space. Cold, Almost makes me forget I how much I despise Nazi's. Liberté!
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