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| Nurse Gypsy and Associates, even their gorgeous smiles have amazing healing power. (Image: Nurse Gypsy & Associates) |
The current pandemic is no fun. It's so bad that even a gearhead like Dutch acknowledges that masks are more important than gags, but feel free to combine the two.
As a suave slave, I understand women love a man with a plan, so I've been researching medical facilities. Just in case. Twitter has the answer to everything. Where do you get the best treatment, how competent is the staff and how devoted are they? I came up with a list that I now carry on a laminated card in my wallet. [1]
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| Take it from a professional, wear a mask. (Image: Nurse Gypsy & Associates) |
One institution stands out: Nurse Gypsy & Associates. They are a small group of female doctors and nurses, completely devoted to their patients. What made me ultimate decide is that these professionals always smile, even with their eyes, something rather unique in today's work environment. It's hard to hear your patient scream in agony while you treat him. Please keep on smiling, there's no better coping mechanism.
So if the worst happens, send me there. I fully accept and understand that treatment will be unpleasant, painful, long-lasting, humiliating and intimidating. Somewhere during treatment I'll probably get desperate and discharge myself. It's probably best to strap me down securely for the full duration of the treatment, no matter how long. It's not about what I want, but what's best for me.
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| Gorgeous eyes, beautiful smile and gloved hands, there's a professional you can trust. (Masked (!) image: Nurse Gypsy & Associates) |
Given the circumstances I have no choice but to accept that I won't be discharged until Nurse Gypsy & Associates are fully convinced I'm cured. That may take a very long time. Discharge only happens after a unanimous vote from all staff members. I also understand that my treatment includes a large number of scary, senseless, sadistic, cruel and painful procedures that are not [necessarily] based on the latest scientific insights. These are professionals fighting an epidemic, they have no time to waste on such niceties as evidence-based medicine. Multiple treatments, on the other hand, may be carried out simultaneously and my pleas for mercy will be ignored. Even if a certain treatment has proven ineffective, staff may choose to continue it, especially if it's considered a morale booster among the staff members. Additional suffering does not entitle me to a discount.
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| Eyes are truly the mirror to the soul. (Masked (!) image: Nurse Gypsy & Associates) |
My only worry is that I cannot figure out if these medical professionals smile to calm their patients or that our screams and suffering make them smile? Can't be, they are professionals. Even if I'm wrong, anything for my health.
Wanna make an appointment yourself? You can find Nurse Gypsy & Associates on Twitter.
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[1] No, I didn't write them on the inside of my mask. Please be serious.
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| I'm slowly beginning to worry their patient's screams is what makes these wonderful women smile. Even better. (Image: Nurse Gypsy & Associates) |
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