That Time My Library Books Were 11 Day Overdue

#NeverNormal AKA You never guess what happened

Librarians in popular culture part 4

A personal note on librarians. It's not just the fake librarians you have to be careful of. Real librarians are very good at changing the rules without telling you. And there is no point in complaining. Complaints are useless. "Haven't you read the note on the door?" "I assume you can read, why else would you be here." Well, there's an explanation for everything. Just read what happened to me the other day. And yes, the book was exactly 11 days overdue. Just my luck.

How Not to Sell Expensive Handbags

Never Normal strikes again

Advertising and BDSM - a match made in hell

From our new, exciting! Sesame Street collection

If you just love Gwyneth Paltrow's 30K bondage chaise, there's more good news. Nope, still hasn't sold out, if that's what you mean. You can ridicule fimdoms all that you want for their bad taste - the most expensive one is the best - but nothing beats a luxury brand in distress.

Never Normal

Let's Be Careful Out There

Don't gamble away your once chance for happiness.

"Do you like oranges or are you just happy to see me?" Scene for The Sinner

Earlier this week I overheard some people talking.

"They thought he went missing but he was visiting his mistress. Now that he is retired, he does that every month as soon as he gets his pension. After a while he re-appears."

"You're kidding me, he used to be such a decent fellow, civil servant and so on, always the perfect gentleman."

"You know what, ever since he retired, he started wearing weird outfits, black latex and stuff. And you know what else?"

"Please stop, I really don't wanna hear it."

How To Make The Most Of Your Prodomme Past

Two life lessons from today's paper. The first one I wrote about before many times. Freaks sell. The second one is that most "stars" are made not born. Take the example of Julia Fox.

He misses her. Ex-wife Kim Kardashian on her way to the 2021 Met gala.

The Guardian asks itself a question. No, not how to write proper click bait, they're good at that. "From dominatrix to debutante: who is Kanye West’s new girlfriend Julia Fox?" Other than mentioning Fox used to be a teenage dominatrix, nothing on the domme stuff, so I delved into it. The most reliable source, obviously, is the Hollywood Reporter, an entertainment industry trade magazine slash gossip glossy. Just like The Guardian, The Hollywood Reporter knows a thing or two about click bait headlines.

"Uncut Gems’ Breakout Julia Fox Worked as a High School Dominatrix"

Praise the Internet

Save some hiccups, technological progress mostly has ups.

Oldest surviving image of mistress and slave, ca 11.000 BCE, predating the Flintstones by 1111 years (plus or minus 34 years). Not sure about her choice of toys. Troglodyte goofball looks happy though.

More often than not I've cursed the internet when it comes to femdom. Yes, I was happy to discover there were others like me. That was before the rise of the online findommes. [1] And if that isn't bad enough, how about the regular articles in women's magazines on how to feel powerful if you're down and out? Be a domme for a day and make all your problems wash away. Not. Attention for BDSM has not only lead to Fifty Shades but also increased attention on television. Sadly, all we're good for is being portrayed as freaks - #never normal - loosers or those cast away by mother nature herself. I beg to differ but rather spend my energy on something else.

Castlevania's Femdom World

Season three only but afterwards you'll be wondering if rule 34 is now a thing of the past.

Castlevania is not a DIY show about the OWK fixing up their new castle but a Netflix animated series about vampires 'n' stuff. It's not very good either. Still I watched. What can I say? Covid-19 anyone?

Artist impression of Lenore and Hector. Awesome image! (Credits: PurpleDNGNoodle on Twitter)

A couple of weeks back Netflix dropped season four, which means it's time for me to start watching season three (2020). Spoilers from here on.

For vampires to live happily ever after all you needs is humans. Lots of us. Mainly to suck the blood out of. Please don't judge, we all do what we have to do. It's take-out night. Spare ribs or burgers?

Rick and Morty Hate Femdom

"I thought the whole point of having a dog was to feel superior."
      - Lawnmower, Rick & Morty season one, episode two.

Plus looking down on a whole bunch of "other" people. 

Don't look so shy Rick, in under two minutes you'll be naked, wearing nipple clamps.

Additional reporting by our #NeverNormal department. 

Rick and Morty is a cartoon show that first aired in December 2013. The general formula consists of the juxtaposition of two conflicting scenarios: an extremely selfish, main character dragging their inferior along for interdimensional adventures, [1] intercut with domestic family drama [2]. What's not to relate?

Rickleclamps. Told you so.

When the program opens it freshman season with 11 episodes, Dutch pays attention. In the Spring of 2020 the cartoon show has finished it's fourth, bland, boring season and a major let-down.

From a business point of view it's unwise to introduce femdom during a pilot. Better wait for the next episode to make sure professional reviewers have heard about it. The second installment introduces Miss Pancake and her dreams to Rick 'n' Morty and the audience - Inception movie style.

In order to limit Google's evil indexing efforts, I'm not gonna add the above text to it's caption. It's a major nasty "fan site" I found the "additional information" about Miss Pancakes on. The rot goes much deeper than anyone realizes.

“Unless you have a kid in a cage, I don’t care.”

A woman who works as a cable tech- and the editor highlighting a single anecdote, that of a guy in a cage.

"Oh my, why did the Huffpost editor decide to pick this particular story for an illustration?"

Just a quick one today, one that proves my theory of "never normal" when it comes to vanilla people accepting kink. It ain't ever gonna happen.

Freaks sell, that wisdom is older than the invention of Gutenberg's printing press, ca 1439. Printing itself by then already existed for hundreds of years, just to remind you.

Porn on TV and the Rejection of Kink

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NCIS - Where Victims of Abuse Turn Masochist

Once you open your eyes, mainstream kink abuse is everywhere

TV show NCIS portrays masochists as victims of abuse and looking for penance through pain rather than consenting adults born this way. It's all about the ratings baby.

"Very, very weird" (Image: NCIS)

Fool me once... Well, you know how it goes. Looking East to salvage my illusion that kink on TV can serve as goodwill ambassador, I was naive. In what would be the penultimate episode of this series, even Japan's anime series Prison School doesn't respect those who are alternatively inclined.

Prison School - Anime Dreams of a Masochistic Teenager

Abandon all hope. Kink on TV only makes things worse.

No matter how much fun it is, when anime depicts masochists as pigs, both literally and figurally, there is no hope of kinksters ever being considered normal people with alternative sexual preferences.

Prison School: Anime that spreads the message: no outsiders, on screen or in the real world.

After my Tokyo session I asked mistress how populair kink in Japan was. "It's really big here" she answered. In part four of our series on why kink on TV won't lead to more mainstream acceptance, a look at Japan and it's anime culture. Unfortunately, East or West, the message is the same. Kink on TV is being exploited for entertainment, even if it means dehumanizing BDSM enthusiasts.

TV Show Billions and the Abuse of Kink for Ratings

Billions opens with the kinkiest scene on TV ever, but as soon as the program gains name recognition, the kink theme is dropped.

"Honey, I'm home.". The opening scene from Billions (Image: Billions)

In part III of why more kink on TV doesn't increase mainstream acceptance, an indept look at Billions and how it uses kink to sell the show.

Basically, Billions made headlines because of it's opening scene. A man is lying on the floor, bound, helpless and nowhere to go. Heels are clicking. A bit of silly conversation is next. Then mistress puts out her cigarette on his chest. The caring woman that she is, she fights the fire that is consuming his flesh by peeing on her slave. She is also his wife, definitely points for that.

"That's Mistress Parrot to you!" and other Cheesy Slave Chores

Why spend more time on educating the general audience, if kinksters are only good for poking fun at? Some examples from the Comedy Central website.

In part II of why more kink on TV doesn't equal increased mainstream acceptance, the silliest things we do for lust.

Researching kink online can be challenging. We men are always interested in naked women and the internet offers plenty of that. Normally I would say "viva la internet" but when you are looking for actual facts with your pants zipped, it gets annoying. Delving into the world of television and kink, I stumbled upon Comedy Central and their unique take on dominance and submission. Don't be too curious, you can sum it up in one word: "really?"

BDSM on TV is Not Going Mainstream

The many looking down on the preferences of the few. Because it sells.

Don't believe the hype, it's a sequel. There is no kink genesis on TV, nor does prolonged exposure to on-screen BDSM lead to more acceptance in general. We're entertainment, that's all folks!

The Mick's Sabrina indulging her superiority complex, a priviliged life only money can buy.

There is one universal fetish all kinksters share: mainstream acceptance. That ain't ever gonna happen, just live and let live would be a pretty decent deal. And no, those proclaiming there's no deeper bond than the one between mistress and her slave are not helping "da cauz". Fifty Shades to the rescue perhaps? Woohaa, that is just as likely as 20 dommes for every slave.

Never Normal: Gotham's Sadistic Bad Girl

Fifty Shades is no more than a look in the world of weirdo's for bored suburbians. And it works brilliantly. The new TV season has kicked of in full and just like last year scriptwriters and directors use and abuse BDSM - or what they think it stands for - to paint a portrait of the depraved villains. 

Blondes are more boring. The women with whips have arrived.

Making sure the audience knows who the bad guys are.

I tried to give a positive spin to femdom on television but the forces of evil are so overwhelming, I had to give up. So I came up with the hashtag #NeverNormal. Yes it works both ways, something the voyeurs overlook.

There is Kink on TV (but it is hidden)

Despite Fifty Shades - there is no ongoing revolution - kink still gets a bad rap in mainstream television. Under the surface are a few exceptions of smart, attractive, strong, dominant women however. Just don't tell the TV bosses.

Don't look so surprised. You're all my whipping boys

In the old days - when you were watching the telly, you could spot the bad guy a mile away because he smoked. Good guys didn't light up. In 2015 smoking is no longer socially acceptable, not even for bad guys, only losers smoke these days. I've said it before and I'll say it again: most mainstream media abuse BDSM to paint a not so pretty picture of the bad guy.

American Dad Clip Promotes Femdom

In the old days the villains on TV used to smoke. That is not done anymore, so often villains are portrayed as kinky freaks. Commercials are in on it too, everybody has seen the vodka dominatrix add. So it came as some surprise when I found out American Dad sneakily promotes femdom. The weird thing is, it is more "realistic" than most I've seen TV. Just look at this short clip. Don't know what episode it is from. How about that?

Click image to play clip

Privacy is "Elementary"

TV shows continue to present kink lovers as freaks. TV show elementary nicely sums up everything that is wrong with modern day morals. Or the immorality of a moral clause in a CEO's contract. Never normal once again.

"Sometimes I discuss ancient torture techniques with Sherlock."

Elementary is an American television show loosely based on the character of Sherlock Holmes. In the episode Poison Pen a dominatrix finds her client dead in his house. The victim is the CEO of a large company who is about to retire. His contract has a “morality clause”. As it turns out his successor staged the whole scene when he found out his boss was dead so the company does not have to pay a 125 million dollar bonus upon retirement.

Sexual Chocolate Wine

This commercial from Slo Down Wines claims their 2011  sexual chocolate wine goes great with equestrianism. Really? Interesting! Why? Must be the fifty shades of grey effect. See the clip here.