Politician Charles Michel. Or how to betray 500 million people because you crave public humiliation on an absurd scale.
Real slaves spend their working hours in the real world where what we do matters. Not EU politician Charles Michel, AKA Mr. Weasel to whom the world is the biggest stage to be publicly humiliated, ever.
|
| Herrin Xena from Germany with her dog slave thingy. Ursula von der Leyen would wish she had even half the personal gravity of Herrin Xena. Any similarity between both women is fictional. |
Once April arrives my dreams get even more vivid than normal. Spring, power tools, a smile to die for and Angola just to name a few. Not exactly dreaming of the country itself - never been there - but of Nzingha Mbandi. Queen Mbandi (1583–1663) was the ruler of the Ambundu Kingdoms of Ndongo (1624–1663) and Matamba (1631–1663), located in present-day northern Angola.
After her brother ascends to the throne, he asks Nzinga to lead a diplomatic mission to the capital of Luanda, where she is to discuss a peace treaty with the Portugese invaders. Upon arriving at the governor's mansion, there is no chair for her, only a mat. A common way for the Portugese to express their believe in the inferiority of conquered Africans. Not that Nzingha's people are subjugated by the Portugese. In response to this, Nzingha's attendant forms himself to be her chair while she speaks to the governor face to face.
All of that happens in 1621. Some things never change and 400 years later, occasionally, chairs used for official ceremonies, are still in short supply. Despite the fact that logistical processes have improved dramatically over the past four centuries.
Sometimes it may feel like that, but Europe is not a country. Instead it's a mess. For or against Europe, a question that became irrelevant a long time ago. For the forseeable future Gaia is carved up into a handful of spheres of influence. Nobody cares about the Netherlands with it's 17 million people. Belgium has about 75 percent our population. Apart from us Dutch, nobody cares about them either. Strength comes in numbers. Let's create a local union, yay!
The mash-up that is the European Union leads to funny and not so funny outcomes. Kinda amusing is the story of a certain member of the European parliament attending a gay sex party in Brussels, getting busted trying to flee over the roof. His rightwing party does not approve of people having sex or something. Said MEP is now a former MEP. And probably a little sad.
|
| Hand coloured lithograph of Nzinga Mbandi. Drawing from the collection of the National Portrait Gallery in London [sic!]. [image source: Wikipedia.] [4] |
Last week EU president Ursula von der Leyen visited Turkey together with Charles Michel, president of the council. Mrs. Von der Leyen leads the 'executive committee'. Despite that, everyone thinks of Mrs. Von der Leyen as the boss lady. Some even know who Mr. Michel is. Most don't. I don't but perhaps that is also partly explained by my preference for bossy ladies.
If three politicians enter a room with only two chairs, there's a problem. As The New York Times put it: 'Two [EU] Presidents Visited Turkey, [one female, one male]. Only the Man Was Offered a Chair.' But that 'man' is not really a man. Or capable of anything. During an earlier visit, Turkish president Recep Erdoğan received two male European presidents. Three chairs are present.
This time only two and a low couch somewhere to the side. Politicians meeting in front of the camera are carefully choreographed events. Which means things do not happen by accident. But that's not why I'm thinking of queen Mbande. Nzingha wanders in and out of my mind whenever she feels like. Completely out of my control. Best backstage pass ever. Very much OK with that. Even better if she told me her visiting hours in advance. Despite that I don't always agree with my petite Nzingha. 'It is what is is...' Yeah, right. You don't even believe that yourself.
So, three chairs, one woman and two men. And yes both males are fighting to offer her their seat. Not. Turkish president Erdoğan is know for his misogynic ideas, best summarized as whatever keeps me in power. Charles Michel is locally know as Belgian's laughing stock. And someone would've ended up in the gutter if it weren't for his papa. Even with the example of having such a powerful father figure, Michels decides to sit this one out and leaves Mrs. Von der Leijden standing.
Looking back, he now admits he has sleepless nights over the incident. And blames Turkey for strictly adhering to the protocol. Of course not. All politics is local and if Erdogan can score brownie points by humiliating a so-called powerful woman, he'll rise to the occasion.
If you are the co-boss of 500 million Europeans, you better step up your game. Charles Michel should have never accepted that seat and leave the real EU president standing. He could have offered her his chair, which he actually declined to do. Or he could have refused to sit down. How about walking away in disgust with co-president Von der Leijden. But to sit your sorry ass down and afterwards complain you haven't slept wel? Unbelievable.
We Europeans are fond of pointing out what's wrong with the United States. Let's travel back in time and assume all of this happened a year ago. President Trump sits down together with the president of Turkey, while his co-president Kamela Harris (yes, very implausible, but please read on) is left scrambling for a place to sit down, the collective European newspapers would happily howl, free superior glow of arrogance included. This time however, they're silent. Democracy is very much lifeless indeed.
As for plan B? There's always a plan B. What if Charles Michel is a Doctor Who fan, who, as part of his daytime job actually does offer Ursula von der Leijden his seat? I've been scolded by mistress more than once for folding my arms behinds my back. Apparently, it's wrong. Folding them in front of me is even worse. Still don't know why. Perhaps she enjoys telling me of. Pretty destructive habit. It is what it is.
Exactly 400 years ago Nzingha's yapoo formed himself to be her chair while she spoke to the governor face to face. [2] What if, instead of remembering history and going down on all fours, offering the boss lady a seat - not very practical in today's political climate - Michel strategically places himself next to Ursula's seat, Rory style [1], hands folded front? [3] Now that's a powerful statement and not something a weasel like Charles Michel will ever be capable of. In the end, all he talks about is laying awake at night because of what happens. And yes, that statement includes zero compassion for his victims. Paying too much attention to receiving bad press can do that to you.
Don't you agree, all that 'dancing with the chairs' nonsense feels a bit like femdom? Protocol, not real world qualifications seem to matter most. And d-----, ahum politicians wonder why we, the voting cattle, loose our faith in the Dar- Si--, ahum democracy.
---
Note:
See also my first story from 2016 about Nzinga Mbandi, the 17th century Angolan warrior queen who forced the Portuguese to their knees.
---
[1] Oh come on, my first Doctor Who insider joke of the day.
[2] Wonderful Girl not looking for a chair, sitting on an eager male attendant instead. Best way ever to start negotiations.
[3] Be honest, what's 2.000 years between lovers? And standing guard over her, Rory gets an extra bonus of spending two millennia watching over Amy.
No comments :
Post a Comment