Serena Williams: How Commerce Sustains Discrimination

Hard work and real dominance are underappreciated.  Stereotypes are overrated. What can BDSM learn from the ordeal of one of the world's best athletes ever?

Real world dominance only comes in one flavour: Hard work.

Some dommes drooled over Furiosa in the latest Mad Max movie. Well, get a load of this: Serena Williams. This woman impresses men the right way: feminine, accomplished, forceful and (not sorry to say) sexy! Who wants a sniper rifle, when all you need is a tennis racket and determination? BTW, I love her smile. Don't you?

Once I Dreamt of Building Mistress a Throne

Long ago I decided that one day I was going to build mistress her very own throne, all by myself. When I saw the perfect throne, I realized, I had never given up on that idea. Learn from me. Don't dream big, it complicates everything.

My imagination running wild, or do the two columns look like 1's. Coincidence?
(Image: Guardian by Naomi VanDoren)

Most of the time I come up with innovative, useful and creative ideas. Only when it comes to kink, my otherwise brilliant plans are deemed to fail. Don't know why. But even if you fail, better do it big and in style.

Why walk? Croquet, the Nigella Lawson Way: In a Sedan

Ever been to the Other Work Kingdom, Nigella? I'm sure you'd love it.

Life is full of irony. When Piggate broke, I felt the urge to demand David Cameron redefined "extreme porn." Clearly he and other members of Britain's establishment had a good time at uni. So did I.

The Guardian decided to add a twist of its own, publishing images of the young and wealthy partying as Oxford students in the 1980s. Other than prime minister David Cameron luminaries include actor Hugh Grant and TV chef Nigella Lawson. Just look at the image and tell me its not femdom-related. Art imitates life. So does femdom. I know of similar images from the OWK and at least one Sardax drawing. Anything to confess Miss Lawson?

Dommes In Innocent-Looking Polka Dot Dresses

Does the uniform matter when it comes to power exchange? If so, what uniform to choose? Some consider the polka dot dress the ultimate in femine attire, but doesn't that make it a uniform at the same time. A bit of light-hearted writing today and for the time being a little less grumpy.

A twist on a classic theme: red bottom meets green dress

Sometimes kink is like really odd. A Tumblr user photo-shopped a sign outside a church. It now reads: "Pleated Skirt Sunday. Ladies wear a nice pleated skirt in church as part of your proper feminine attire for church."

Sub Surplus: Why "It's Raining Men" Is Not A Good Thing

Domme Deficit or Sub Surplus: Men raining down from the heavens above is always a bad thing. Not because we are trouble. It messes with your mind and replaces "needs" with "wants" and "can have's".

You know? In the end most men would love to rain down on women.
That is, if they end up with a fun girl, Don't act surprised. You knew all along. We love you.

Remember that 1980s song: "It's Raining Men?" Sounds like a good thing if you are a woman, now doesn't it? Well, sometimes it ain't. The sub surplus is the worst thing that ever happened to dominant women. Spoilt for choice - or so it seems initially - some get greedy. Rather than thinking about what they really want, they ask for all they can have, whether or not they really like it. You know, because "Yes, we can." Don't worry, they'll regret it later. And their subs as wel.

Grace Jones: "I'll Never Write My Memoirs"

“Hiding, secrets, and not being able to be yourself is one of the worst things ever for a person. It gives you low self-esteem. You never get to reach that peak in your life. You should always be able to be yourself, and be proud of yourself.”

Bad design I know, two images so close together, but this portrait from The New York Times is just amazing.

Never? Guess what? They were published today.
Four months ago, on her birthday, I argued Grace Jones is the original femdom icon. By then the world was awaiting her memoirs. For a long time Grace Jones maintained she would never write them, but she changed her mind. Haven't read them yet and it probably is gonna take some time before I do but here are some reviews.

Thank You For Not Caring: Any Hint At Child Porn Is Wrong

Anything between adults has to be consensual. Whatever happens with kids is by definition non-consensual. A while ago I saw a video of a woman trampling a highly realistic looking doll resembling a five year old. To me that is child porn in disguise. The admins disagreed. I forgot their argument, but it probably ran among the lines of "It is just a doll." "I don't see the problem." "No one got harmed." They are wrong. It doesn't work like that and worse, it aids in the continued suffering of children.

It reminded me of the first time I reported child porn to Tumblr, back in March  2013. For some reason I never posted the draft, but here it is.

The beginning of something very consensual and very adult. It includes suffering, submission and being hers, which given the first two items on the list, is harder than you think. No matter how much you love her.

Power of Love: If You Love Her, Trust Your Gut

Why I'll never visit Club Pedestal. Taking a trip down memory lane. Remembering what matters. And whom you should pledge your allegiance to.

Years ago I had a girlfriend, who was battling a serious disease. One day she sprayed her ankle or similar, I can’t remember. The first night after the incident, I made her promise to wake me up and help her to the bathroom, just in case.

Why not? Whatever makes you smile. As long as you are together. On second thought: Lucky guy.

When I woke up the next morning, she told me, every time she turned over, I woke up and sat up straight. I briefly glanced at her and fell asleep. Apparently I also helped her to the bathroom that night, twice. Can’t remember a thing, but it took me two more nights to get back to my usual routine. Or so I was told.

Puppet On a String: Love Turns Men Into Slaves

I've been asking myself what the difference is between the things we (men) do for love and those we do because we "serve." Whatever that is.

One night, I came home and literally tripped over the couch.

"I rearranged the furniture, but I don't think it's gonna work"

Really, what gave it away? Of course the apartment was mine, not hers.

Silly girl, why do you even have to ask.

Facesitting For Birthday Boys

If it's fun and quirky, it's definitely me. A few weeks back I posted a GIF I christened "Facesitting For Advanced Practitioners." This one doesn't have the bouncing factor, but is just as good. Look at her eyes before she takes the plunge. What a way to start your (her/his) birthday. I assume it's someone's birthday at least, lol. So much fun. Just be careful I don't mistake you for some burglar and smack you. Now that would spoil the fun, wouldn't it?

Not sure he appreciates it, but she loves it. Isn't that what matters?

Vivere Autem Est Pati - To Live Is To Suffer

Femdom, BDSM or whatever is about love. Yes, quirky, corrupt and messed up. Isn't that what love is sometimes? Against the odds, when everybody says it's impossible. If you don't get that, jump of the bloody cliff. If you are still alive look at this. I wish I had written such beautiful letters.

If you love someone, you'll find a way. Outside of time, space and language.