Personal Gravity

There is no difference between the Vanilla and the Dark. Men fall in love only to surrender and obey. Happiness on planet Earth is easy. As long as you avoid dishonesty.

Leonard Beaumont, Sunbathers, Linocut

Incredible things happen to real people. Trust me, I'm very real. Also male, opinionated and lover of all things Dark [1]. On top of that I'm something of a rebel. Not the easiest [femdom] life choice, but a joyful and honest one. Not that I'm 24/7 happy. And no, chastity won't help.

The other day I joked: "Remember you dude, you are there husband of..." Despite the fact he's my best friend, I couldn't resist. He doesn't like it, but he understands. That's me. If I'm not poking fun at you, I don't care. Seriously.

Things get complicated when Dutch falls in love with a girl who also dabbles in dominance and submission on the side. For fun.

"Worship me!"
"Whatever. [D'oh]"
"I love you no matter what, even if you don't share my love for the Dark Side."

Wrong answer for almost ten out of ten women. It's why they invented the number eleven. Still, we messed up beyond repair. Not funny. To suffer for love is evil. No-one ever should. [2]

We all benefit from some time to slow down and reflect upon our desires. Time spent focusing on what makes us happy is never wasted. It's also rare these days. Sadly, generally speaking desire doesn't equal love. It's about animal attraction at best. Only those who are truly blessed and privileged are offered - at random - to see the full truth. It mainly happens on those rare occasions where desire shows it's true colours. Usually the lucky few are liberated, after they've been schooled in the art of finding a balance between lust on the one hand versus love and devotion on the other. Ask yourself, is he kneeling in front of you because he feels submissive and horny. News flash, chastity doesn't help. And what if he doesn't kneel? So you make it to 11th base. Ask yourself, what it means if the man you love and trust, never talks back because of "that's the way submission goes." Does he care for you or is he just one more femdom fun predator?

To be a rebel is to be blessed, especially when you identify as part-time slave slash submissive. To be appreciated for that special quality is something else. Doesn't mean that if you're hot and we click one time only, I won't drop to my knees. Of course I do, but the power exchange will be limited. To be impressed and to surrender are separate stages in the submission of a man. For Dutch to give up control in this world, I have to understand who you are. Why do you take my breath away? Also, how skilled are you in leaving vanilla hints - impossible to decipher for Vanilla's why I should drop to my knees. Step two [in our newly discovered intimate, secret language of course] are suggestions that allow me to grasp the basic concept in the ways I can please you. Whatever you do, at least grant me the privilege of allowing me to try and impress you - woman and domme. But only if there's a click when we look into each other's eyes. After all, the power of a woman is never revealed any other way.

A domme is a woman first, always and above anything else. To me, that's the very definition of femdom. Yes, I love hot leather outfits, but all they do is add to the fun, just like me being naked when I drop to my knees in front of you. Of course I shiver in anticipation, realizing just how blessed I am to granted to experience the full force of your true personality and power.

Think about it, why do I drop to my knees? Not because of those seriously hot boots, but because of the woman you are. Of course our little secret makes it easier. But who cares that we've only just met or have known each other for over 11 years? The beauty of female power - and my willingness to surrender - is undeniable. What matters is that your strength meets my instinct to surrender to the one (one). Not because it's hot, but because there is more than meets the eye. Doesn't matter if it's only for tonight or for the rest of our lives. All we men need to know is that we are in the presence of the one (one). What separates vanilla and dark is whether we drop to our knees or simply say "I love you". Men inevitably surrender in the presence of female strength. Variations on the definition of the words "female power" makes no difference. For every man in this world there is a woman who will love him, guide him and guard his soul, safety and sanity at all costs. Life is simple. Still, we bow, because we understand.

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[1] Yes, OWK, feel fry to start crying.

[2] “A fool for love is a fool for pain”, a line from How Can I Ease The Pain, by Lisa Fischer. One of Dutch all-time favourites. No, because it's a great song.

Lisa Fischer - How Can I Ease The Pain (1991)