Hint: Michelle Pfeiffer and perhaps a whip
[Catsuits are so optional]
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| "Felines just wanna have fun." Michelle Pfeiffer jumping ropes out of the frame. |
Not everybody appreciated my discussion of the song 'Whip It'. You cannot be happy all the time. Me for instance am less than thrilled when dommes who fiercely denounce prodommes [666] suddenly decide to celebrate their birthday for an entire month on Twitter. Now it's OK for random strangers to send prezzies. No bigger fall from grace than showing your double standards.
Now that I have that out of my system, let's talk about more interesting things, like whips and how a song with that word in it has nothing to do with BDSM. Of course not. After all, nobody assumes that all kink-related words that begin with an f are about findom. Yes, now I'm really done for today, so let's talk about felines, I mean whips.
The elegant solution to the perennial problem of who is the best Catwoman, is to divide it in two. Best small screen Catwoman is Eartha Kitt, just like Michelle Pfeiffer is the best big screen Catwoman. Orson Welles once called Eartha Kitt "the most exciting woman in the world". Apparently she also learned Dutch. You know what comes next. Yes, more on that later.
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Catwoman Eartha Kitt |
For a guy who isn't into blondes - guess I'm no gentleman - I do have a weak spot for Michelle Pfeiffer. Quirky is good. Recently she played the wife of financial fraudster Bernie Madoff in The Wizard of Lies. Mr. Madoff ran a successful Ponzi scheme for decades. Both Robert de Niro [as Madoff] and Michelle Pfeiffer deliver an excellent performance in an otherwise mediocre production. Among Pfeiffer's most acclaimed films are The Fabulous Baker Boys (1989) and Dangerous Liaisons (1988) but most people remember her best as Selina Kyle in Batman Returns (1992). [3] Of course she looks great in that catsuit but that's not why she impresses so much, it's simply the performance of a lifetime. And yes, Mrs. Pfeiffer did that more than once.
In the middle of Batman Returns Catwoman breaks into a department store and uses her whip to snap the heads of four mannequins before blowing the place up. Blowing up stuff has nothing to do with femdom but it's cool, so why leave it out. The scene is shown from different angles making it impossible to tell when Michelle Pfeiffer is doing the whipping and when she is replaced by a stunt double. Hint: she did all her stunts herself. Another reason I like her.
Last year a behind the scenes clip was released on showing Michelle Pfeiffer whipping the heads of those four mannequins in one take. It's amazing and Mrs. Catwoman is clearly enjoying herself. Swinging from decapitation victim number two to her third beheading shows Mrs. Pfeiffer is a natural. Just beautiful. But what I like best is the way she jump ropes out of the frame. That's how you wear your crown.
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Look what I found. An irresistible image of Michelle Pfeiffer smiling,
holding up her Catwoman whip. |
Epilogue
Mrs. Pfeiffer clearly cherishes her whip. It began the day she picked it up, back in 1992 when she was shooting Batman Returns. Just look at how she caresses her whip. Decades later she still does. In March of 2019 she writes on Instagram: "Look what I found". In another post she shows of her skills almost 30 years later. "It's like riding a bike." Now that's something Dutch understands. [1] And women with whips of course.
Time to Face the Music
Always a tough one. Why? Because there is so much to choose from. Some kind of mix is playing on the radio as I write this. Hey that's Fade Into Darkness by Avicii! What are the odds? The intro to Girls Just Wanna Have Fun is running under it as a teaser. So tired of the Eighties but this seems appropriate.
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Fame? I'm gonna live forever? Oops, wrong Eighties. It's Cyndi Lauper
- Girls Just Wanna Have Fun.
Click to listen. |
199
Did you know today is day 199 of the war in Ukraine? Just mentioning it. Finally some good news. The BBC reports about the Kharkiv offensive: Russian forces retreat as Ukraine takes key towns.
In our pop quiz: who's afraid of yellow and blue. Red of course. Not Dutch. I don't even fear mistress. Her whip though...
Notes:
[1] As for why Indiana Jones didn't retire when Michelle picked up her whip, that I don't get. [2]
[2] And Wonder Woman vs Catwoman? Don't ask. Remember how Wonder Woman lost her whip? Won't happen to Mrs. Pfeiffer.
[3] Pfeiffer's least acclaimed film is no doubt Amazon Women on the Moon (1987). Her performance is lackluster. One can only wonder why. Because it's true? Wouldn't surprise me now that I know the Leather Goddesses of Phobos are real. [4] What else is out there? Fire Maidens from Outer Space (1956)? Nay, that's just a movie, probably the worst movie of all times. Cat-women of the Moon (1953) on the other hand? Yes a movie but then again who would have ever guessed that Catwoman would fall in love with her whip. The truth is out there.
[4] Hey, give me a break. A guy can dream.
[5] Didn't think of that title for this post myself but lost the reference.
[666] Certain no-pro, natural dominant, alpha women [couldn't resist] believe they are superior to other women. Cute. Not.
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